Aqua XwMuthkwium = Musqueam Creek Water


Vergleich: Siehe: Aquae allgemein


[Sonja Mc Leod]

One side (l.)


>: Water (Moisturizers, Rain, Washing)


Miasm: Tubercular

Major Themes

Tubercular Miasm:

Restless & Scattered, Moving from Place to Place

There is a scattered energy to this remedy, flitting from place to place with lots of energy (also the opposite, extreme tiredness).

The idea of taking a long journey down a meandering path was a theme of this remedy.


had a desire for activity and there is a dissatisfied flightiness to the remedy as well, not wanting to stay with any one thing (DD.: Tuberculinum/ADHS).

There can be a lot of anger and irritability but it comes and goes very quickly.

Nerve pain also came and went quickly, moving from place to place all over the body.

This theme relates to the overactive nervous system (see below).

Emotional or Physical Trauma leads to Brain Damage

This could be a good remedy for children with neurological brain disorders such as autism, sensory processing disorder or ADHD, because most of these types of

disorders can be traced back to either emotional trauma in the mother, toxins from pharmaceuticals or vaccines.

This could also be a good remedy for adults with neurological disorders such as multiple sclerosis, Alzheimers, dementia, Parkinson’s disease, or migraines (when there has been abuse or emotional trauma or if there is a toxic component in the case. People suffering from psychiatric brain disorders such as chronic depression, schizophrenia and manic depressive/bipolar disorders could also

benefit. There was also a theme of suicide and preoccupation with death in the remedy, which is usually a common symptom for sufferers of chronic depression, schizophrenia and bipolar.

Also a remedy that could be indicated after a stroke resulting in neurological damage. Or a car crash where there has been trauma to the head.

Diving into the Subconscious: Expression not Suppression

Water can help the client express themselves and speak their truth.

This remedy can bring up suppressed memories, thoughts and feelings so that healing can take place. The client can take an honest look into their subconscious; water tranquilizes an agitated mind

(an overactive nervous system) so that the client can view their past trauma in a less emotional, more matter of fact way.

Accepting the dark side of one’s past leads to personal growth and transformation, a peaceful mind and a better future.

The client now has a chance to start over and begin again.

The subconscious is often expressed in dreams, so delving into the dreams of a client needing this remedy would be helpful to give them more awareness of their issues.

A remedy with deep action because of its affinity for the brain and nervous system. Brings past trauma to the surface so one should be mindful and cautious with a client who is not ready or unwilling to go that deep.

Memory Loss:

Remembering/Forgetting the Past

Remembering the past, dreams about the past. Ancestral themes, grandmother energy.

There may be a history of a traumatic past or abuse, accompanied by a sense of guilt and a wish to forget the past.

For example, there may be self-medication with alcohol, recreational or pharmaceutical drugs, or denial of negative experience via positiveeir past trauma in a calm, objective, non-judgmental way so that healing and transformation can take place. new-agey affirmations and meditations.

The therapeutic action of this remedy could look similar to ibogaine (Iboga) therapy for drug addicts.

Like a tranquilizer, this remedy has the ability calm and soothe frazzled nerves (an overactive nervous system), making it easier to face traumas from the past. Neurological disorders passed down the

family (genetic) line, or unresolved neurological damage or trauma that has been suppressed by a family member, only to resurface in subsequent generations.

This remedy could also assist somebody with memory loss, either caused by physical trauma to the brain or emotional trauma (with diagnosis of brain damage, dementia, Alzheimer’s, etc).


A client needing this remedy may have the feeling that they have done something wrong, of guilt, like they have sinned in some way. This is a common feeling of victims of trauma  such as rape or abuse victims.


Related to the feeling of being dirty is the idea of cleansing. The client has toxic injury or a trauma in the past, which has altered their brain structure, leaving it damaged and unclean. Once the remedy is given, an internal cleansing will take place, likely resulting in a skin eruption or mucus discharge through the nose - it is very important not to suppress the discharge as it is a sign of healing.

It’s not possible to erase the past completely but it is possible to gain a calm, matter of fact, non-judgemental perspective on one’s past in order to cleanse, transform and move forward with life.

Allergic & Immunity Symptoms: Skin Complaints & ENT (Ear, Nose, Throat) Complaints

Skin complaints (e.g. cuts) slow to heal. Skin eruptions with itching that can be so intense that one scratches until it bleeds. There was also a lot of sneezing and irritation in the nostrils, and sometimes the throat, with a lot of mucus.

Provers also experienced blocked ears. These symptoms are typical symptoms of allergy, hayfever, colds & flus. These symptoms are tied to the cleansing aspect of the remedy. After giving this remedy, neurological symptoms will start to improve and cleansing will take place through the skin and mucus membranes - do not suppress this cleansing reaction.

Several provers also experienced symptoms of heartburn + burping.

Heartburn is a common symptom of an overactive nervous system.

Bladder Symptoms

This remedy can cause symptoms similar to cystitis: the frequent urge to pee, inflammation, chills and painful urination.

Overactive Nervous System Themes


All provers noted the sensuality of this remedy. One prover felt a cool breeze flowing over her body during the proving.

An overactive nervous system: children with autism and Sensory Processing Disorder often have issues with touch.


Vertigo, Incoordination, Nausea and Vomiting

There was vertigo and light-headedness sometimes + nausea and vomiting. It felt a bit like being on a small boat, so this can be a useful remedy for seasickness.

There was clumsiness, slipping, and incoordination. Could look like MS or Parkinson’s.

Nerve Pain

Pains were typically short and stabbing in various places: head, abdominal area, extremities and spine (DD.: Hyper)

The nerve pain sometimes alternated with numbness.

Could be a good remedy for carpal tunnel syndrome, fibromyalgia, sciatica and migraine headaches.

Nervousness & Agitation

This remedy has the ability to calm and soothe an irritable, agitated person with an overactive nervous system.

Other Physicals

Tendency towards constipation

Sore breasts

Heart trouble

SRP: Delusion of a cool breeze blowing all over body

Dry cough

Other Themes & Imagery

Insects (SPIDERS, Mosquitos, Cockroaches)

Useful as an Acute or Intercurrent Remedy for: Seasickness, Cystitis

General cleansing from drugs or toxins

To open up a case and bring past issues to the surface

Remedy Nucleus

Polycrest for neurological disorders: autism, ADHD, multiple sclerosis, schizophrenia, migraines, etc.

Cleanses the brain from toxins, injury or past trauma/abuse

Rebirth: brings subconscious issues to the surface, calms & aids in personal transformation

Overactive nervous system (agitation, nerve pain, vertigo with nausea, incoordination)

Tubercular miasm (scattered & restless)


Trituration Proving

Before the Trituration:

Prover # 3’s Journal

November 8, 2011

Dream: last night at my now deceased baba’s house. Wanted strawberry homemade jam; knew where it ought to be except there was none, cleaning products there instead; didn’t want

to wake anybody up - it was a nightmare. Disappointed.

This morning, while rifling through cabinet, non-purposefully (sort of tidying dishes) at the very back I spot a homemade jar of strawberry jam – exactly as I had wanted. Yes!

I thought I’d used up or given away all the jam I made. Happy to find some <3

Last few days and weeks – keep seeing something dark (small, cat-size) to my left – just out of peripheral ... I turn to look .... Nothing. It’s not good or bad....just is. .............................................................

Earlier (Nov 4?)

Having a moment of “what am I going to do?!” Despair, low self worth, money worries, life direction! Just while going to bed. Finally decided to hand it over to Universe for help, guidance.

Went to sleep.

Next morning:

Wake up, decided not to make any “decisions” today, just follow what’s shown to me, my inner pulse...intuition. No left brain logic! Then hubby announces “We’re going to France.”

He’s reading email. I am in love with France. I’ve always wanted to go. Of late I’ve been saying out loud that if we can figure a way to go for a few months “taste test” – we’d for sure do it.

Voila! Am invited by friend D. Awesome!

All for an “ashram labor” fee (whoo!!)

November 11, 2011:


Lots of unpleasant dreams this morning. One after another. Despite going to bed at a reasonable hour, I am sleepy. Tired. Emotion. Remembrance Day. My skin refuses to heal. Hangnails.

Paper cuts. A week ago I drank ¾ cup of regular 2% milk. My face (chin/jaw “lower half”) broke out. Several “underground” painful pimples. This is a common reaction to milk for me, but they refuse to heal! -not common. Just noticing now - seems to be all on right side of face -  open. Exposed - vulnerable - raw.

Been quite hungry lately. Growls in morning.

Creative output. REALLY wanting to integrate new (old, actually) more vibrant vocabulary into my writing. Dictionary, thesaurus have been my friends.

Dr Emoto’s (from him signed) book is floating around my desk. LOVE HIS WORK.

I feel like there’s so much to do! In an excited (usually) way - like “let’s go, people!” And at night it feels overwhelming and can push me to anxiety.

2 of 3 mayoral candidates for my city have personally called upon me, inviting me to have tea and understand them (= win their vote). This is quite specific and amazing. They’ve taken note of the voice

I had over that last rezoning debacle, it seems.

I refuse to be quiet and unexpressed. NEVER again.

Oh right - breasts super sensitive at least 3 times now, noticed sharp, stabbing in ovaries(?) the right lower abdomen anyway...enough to make me double over for a second. Itchy small of back.

Before the Trituration:

Prover #2’s Journal

same pattern. We do not know if she will keep the baby or not but she is already 7 weeks and it definitely gets harder the longer she waits.

I already knew that Y is pregnant. She is 23 and I was emailing her but wanted her to tell me so I just asked how she was doing and she started to tell me the horrors that she has created in her life. She told me that she was going to be evicted from her house so she decided to sell drugs and got busted with a lot in her possession. She said that the worse thing for her case is that she does not do them so they look at that worse. Anyways she is looking at house arrest! At least I am praying that she gets house arrest with the baby coming. She is happy about her baby.

Then I found out Z has heart trouble has to have open heart surgery and very soon! He is very stubborn and does not want to do it, probably does not want to be here on earth anymore, lots of people are choosing to leave.

As I share this it does not feel light at all but that is ok

Then there was all the stuff about the interdimensional BS! I was getting flashes of another life that I have lived, and because everything happens simultaneously anyways I am living it and it was just really weird.

Before the Trituration:

Prover #3’s Journal

Health Matters

Broken tooth (Oct 23)

Knee (leg) - right side


Heart issues - clogged arteries

Dreams: about the past. Tenderness/compassion/sensuous

Before the Trituration:

Sonya’s Journal


3, 2011

Gathered the water today.

I feel a stillness. Sensation of coolness in my hands. And was getting twinges on my left shoulder, then my right shoulder.

Hubby: nausea, aches and pains, teeth chattering, needs a lot of blankets. He mentioned bladder infections (maybe useful for an acute).

Me: I keep getting this sensation of a cool breeze blowing over me. And wandering pains, here and there, all over my body.

November 6

For a few days now have had this dot on my right shoulder, not raised but a little redness and it hurts when I touch out. Seems to be skin not muscle related.

U has had some itching and rash for the last few nights with scratching. He’s also had increased urination (at night). Poos have been more solid for him and for me as well, a little on the

constipated side.

Dream: last night of riding on a skateboard, sliding easily around the road, twisting and turning.

U’s sleep has been very bad, and I have been feeling tired earlier, #4 has also felt more tired.

U had a rough night last night.

Dream: being in a town/village, worried about people committing suicide.

If one person committed suicide, worried that others would commit suicide, kind of like a dam bursting. Another dream about being concerned that our town would flood.

Intense itching all night long, only better after applying cream. There are welts all over his body (raised) and the itching/welts are worse around his ankle and heel area. He thought he might die

from the itching, like a horror movie, like he is under the illusion that he’s covered by spiders and he will claw himself to death, never ending continuous itching like he would slough his skin away everywhere.

November 7

Last night dream of someone from my past showing a photograph of me he had taken of me in the past to my parents - he was a “boy I had liked” in the past, I had never told him my feelings.

Another dream of being in a town/village on a snowy mountain, driving around etc.

Next dream: being with a group of people, some were past friends, we were trying to complete a task, a bit like Amazing race - we went to Safeway and had to communicate with an authority

from outside the store by phone (like a payphone but free). There was a bit of a division in the group, some members went off somewhere, I remember going off to look at some plants outside

the store (I remember eating some dirt as well?!) I tried to pick up the phone and communicate but the person on the other end hung up, then another group member had to try....

November 8

Feeling a lot sleepier lately (wanting to go to bed earlier). Waking up a few times per night but going back to sleep fairly easily, as I feel tired.

Blowing my nose and getting some nasal blockage/discharge the last day or so, worse left sinus.

Last night had lots of dreams but feeling too lazy to write them down in the middle of the night so forgot most of them.

The one dream I remember: I was in a massive hotel suite with my mom. For some reason, soon before we arrived they’d had to move the whole hotel to another building. That’s why the rooms in

our building seemed odd, because the building wasn’t built to be a hotel.

November 9

I dreamt a lot but remembered none.

I’ve been noticing more abdominal cramping, especially in the middle of the night or upon waking. I do sometimes get this but it seems to have increased, plus doesn’t seem to be related to eating.

The sneezing and coryza continues, with clear or white discharge. It seems to be worse when I’m downstairs, closer to the creek water I gathered.

Getting a lot of thoughts about incidents from the past, just floating through my mind. Memories of past incidents, past people I knew, etc. It’s like a catalogue of past events going through my mind.

Also noticed that I can get irritated and very grouchy very suddenly, and then the next moment feel fine and agreeable. The emotion doesn’t really stay with me for long.

Had a dream sometime before the trituration about walking along a path in the mountains to a Mecca-like location (desert). I remember the walk being very long and I was worried about getting there and back before dark. I had had the option of taking transportation but had chosen to walk because I didn’t know it would be such a long walk.

Musqueam Creek Water Trituration Notes (November 12, 2011)

C1: Sonya

Water swirling whoosh. Fast. Smooth. Life journey.

Prickle in left nostril. Circle of life. I feel the wind blowing. Rain is smooth.

#4: Native connection? Creek is on Musqueam land. We’re on Native land.

Rain falling, falling, falling. Cycle of life. Rain falls, then goes up to the sky. Comes back down.

I see a flood of water. Water everywhere. On the ground. Giant puddles. Whirlwind. Splash. Big bursts of water. Snow. When water freezes it becomes ice. Avalanche. Rain and snow fall downwards. Then evaporate upward. So much movement. Always moving, fluid not solid.

Pain in left side of neck.

#2: (re: her water bottle, takes the lid off) :This water does not want to be contained!

The water flows through my memories, like it flows through life, drifting...Every single memory, retrospective, it won’t let us forget. Every single memory we have is a part of us. It’s what makes us who we are. We can try to forget but it won’t let us. Anything we try to suppress will float to the surface. A mirror. Reflecting our life, without judgement, it just is. This is truth, this is our life. With no emotion attached to it. (tight feeling in ribcage above my stomach).

Conversation about having girls vs. boys. Apparently families with 2 girls are happiest, with boy and girl

2nd happiest, hardest with all boys. (both me and #2 have to break for pee) #3 is wearing an orange t-shirt, blue scarf and purple jacket.

Usually would not wear so many colours together.

I see a woman. Water Nymph. Her eyes are deep blue. Galadriel comes to mind. She is wise and all-knowing and sits at the side of the creek on the rocks. If you look closely you

can see me, I am always there. Sitting, waiting.

Are you human?

No. Long ago when the world was magical, you saw me and you wrote stories. The Musqueam still visit, they see me and talk to me. We laugh and chat and visit for awhile. They still believe in magic. They are the only ones who visit me. Sometimes I get lonely, sitting here and waiting. Sometimes animals will visit – dogs and fish.

Finding it hard to focus. To focus, you have to stick with one thing. Themes about the past: just random thoughts about the past popping.

#2 dyed her hair bright pink a week ago (wondered if she should go rainbow)


Prover #2

When we drove in today we took a meandering trail instead of going our usual path.

Time seemed to slow down for us.

As they begin to grind I can feel a chill on my shoulders.

I can feel the water spirit watching.

As if from behind and over

Just watching


I can feel the energy begin to tingle through my veins.

My hands have a restlessness, circling in movement, shaking them out dissipates it.

It is as if every mineral in my physical body is alive, open mouthed, calling.

Breathing in deeply

Quite a lot of energy.

Pain in my right knee

Really jittery, more nervous system.

Deep breaths help.

Ah ha ha ha sound.

Tingles up the back of my neck, like someone is bruising my hair with hands.

Very sensual, movement quality.

The bridge between the solar plexus and <3 is open, stimulated.



Twirling around


Always moving

No boundaries

Images of animals large and small drinking, satisfying their thirst

Apparently not just the little animals

I am thirsty too

My eyelids have a burning sensation, just slightly behind them

Thoughts fleeting escaping coming and going so swiftly like I can’t quite grab them.

There is a lightness to this energy, as if my body is cold and floating.

Almost is a state of nothingness

Nothing and everything all at once.

Purpose destination but no substance.

I feel like sighing, not mournfully but contentedly, drifting lazily along

As if being stared right through I don’t quite exist


It is only that which is around me forms what I am that reflects my purpose

Burning point in my left of sternum.

It feels like a touchy feely substance

Wants to be caressed, massaged


Dancing, Prancing


The pain is like a spot just left of the sternum.

Rubbing it makes it better

Feeling like I don’t want to be confined, want to run away.

Move, keep moving, sitting still like torture, stagnant.

Thank heavens for muscles, even the act of flexing them makes the fidgety, restless confinement go easier.

Feel like I have to move, rock, flex - quick repeated movement, feels better.

It’s funny when the water spirit came it was a male energy and the divas feel female in energy and are many

Sparkling, dancing

Now the chest spot moved over to the right side, same as before just different side

Ears subtle plugging

Frequency adjusting


Very difficult to grasp this energy.

It slips right through

Dreams of past.

Watched Dollhouse last week. Crazy show, a lot of violence. They have technology that erases your brain and memories and can imprint any personality they want,

they join the dollhouse, will give 5 years of

their life. Multimillion dollar company, if they’re rich enough they can have a doll for their fantasy. They will get the dolls to be a special agent to retrieve something that’s lost.

Watched it this week, aggressive and violent. The thoughts flow out and the memories, they have no memory of who they are.

C1: Prover #4

Broken sleep (grandmother), headache

Grandmother presence - feeling - ancestral

Slight - birds = 2 elements - air and water

Family healing, wounding



Trust (strangers) kindness (welcoming)

Headache - emptying from top

Breathe, bathe, balance

Birds: flight (playfulness), feeling, freeing, flowing

4 + 2 - responsibility

Eyes - tightness, jaw



Changing (transforming) Don’t like, I’m bored



Slow moving, slow gradual changes, gentleness


Reflective, feminine, slow moving, world wide

C1: Prover #3

Right ear. Dull block.

Right side of face tingle dull (at the same time?!)


Ease. Easy. Sahara says feel like eating chocolate cake -yes- that light easy feeling of cake

Light blue glitter


Light relaxed easy going feeling. Playful. Lalala

Every color. One.

I had to wear all these colors today. It’s a little crazy, this combo.


Water. Heh. This is funny. Of course it’s wet. I could pack it like sand.

Itchy nose.

Water bottle falls. Ooh! OK

Silly. Free. Fluid. I want to join.

Let’s go! An adventure....

Look, all the things we can see.

Everywhere. We are connected.

We are source. All light, all colour, all source. Isn’t it so pretty. Feminine. But balanced.

Forever. Circles. Curl.

However you think it is, it is

Physical? Sure, but that’s not our focus here. Other dimension. Unseen.

I like the dinging pinging sound.

Bells. Drums. Symphony.

All nature comes alive with us.

Glitter sparkle. Rainbow color.

Essence. Life light.

Pituitary gland must be yellow and blue. I just forgot but now I see the combo and remember.

Difference between ducks and goose?

Really! How is it divided up?

Just let it flow! Whooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Still itchy face. Centre.



Doesn’t matter, free to flow.

Just make color.


C Kuler

Color c kuhler

Collar. In soundse....

All mean something you call them words. It’s essence. Calling it forth. To name it.

I don’t trust that timer. Technology...

Hmmm....It’s not real.


I am everything

Itchy right face center

This could save the world.

Well that’s no small feat. But it’s time

Slippery this morning. Almost fall down.


Water everywhere. Are you getting it yet?

I feel no need to be tidy, neat. “Structured”

I can just write wherever....

However on the page


Hehehehe so funny. Don’t have to use lines. But writing in the lines.

Pop. We make pop corn pop.

I am explosive. Soft. Nurturing. All, ALL.

The yellow leaf

All floating for a time

Time and space distorted

C7: Prover #3

Water -you’ve pushed us downstream here- what is it you wish to communicate?

Water can exist in so many forms, so many states. Infinitely adaptable. Always can get around any block.

Flows through it, or around it, or dissolves it, erodes it. But always it will move forward. Can never be

stopped. Even dams and rocks break down.

Dryness, dusty, dehydrated in throat.

Water, because it is infinite, could carry us forever. Ever deeper.

Sometimes words are unnecessary. Just to be in quietude.


I believe we are in a State (vs. an identity) right now.

Objectivity. Is there such a thing and are we there? Plying the waters of ________________

Fathoms deep. We are asked to trust our own wisdom instead of seeking it outside of self or first taking others’ advice over our own wisdom’s guidance.

Must we question so much? (a question – LOL). Really, so much is so simple we needn’t complicate it by trying to describe it.

Like - try to describe “blue” without referencing COLOR - how could someone understand blue if you’re using color to describe color? Oh –

OK. Stop. Too many words.

Scraping seems so long.

I would love a brilliant flash of insight except I think that comes when necessary, and right now...there isn’t a pressing question.

Every colour is a pearl of wisdom.

Spectral Circle.

Full circle



All colour. Every colour forever.

I want there to be a symphony - a grand and beautiful orchestration of music and souls. All coming together united, unified, unity

Water is unity unity

Unity unity UNITY UNITY

Unity Unity Unity Unity Unity

Unity Unity Unity Unity Unity

Unity Unity

Unity Unity Unity All Unity

Think of the beautiful scents. Natural, floral...rose, lavender, orange, bergamot.

Hmm. Pearl of wisom. Why do we say that? Pearls of the water. Now we come to a point of Beauty. Beauty. So important and, in a patriarchal world, so often overlooked.

Beauty, simply for beauty’s sake is healing.


Beauty can be found in so many places. Harmony can be found.

They can be created, generated.

I feel like swooping around a ballroom in a beautiful silken gown. Waltzing in step with P. In harmony, in flow. Together but each in our roles. Masculine and feminine in our

eternal dance.

Serene “Highness” <3

C7: Prover #4

About Connections

Left arm itchy - pay attention to the feminine

Grandmothers here, one with each person

Pain in lower (abdomen)/bandages wrapped around always conscious of my chest area

Feel teary thinking about my grandmother

Last night with MIL - pleasant

Kaleidoscope rose

Stir - connection to “helper spirits”

Stopped stirring - heartburn back

Throat, stomach pain

Ask for help

Dark funnel out of my body (front)


Costume (masked) figure -behind me- put hand over my mouth - “don’t speak”

Front teeth hurting - also middle ring finger of right hand

Avoiding arguments because of needing to be right

Throat itchy, abdomen sore

Bug in my car - abdomen

Caterpillar transforms into a butterfly

Statistics on illnesses

Answer to a question - pressing regarding work

C7: Sonya

Aysha’s left arm is itching, feels like she has a bug bite

Things feel a little lighter again,

I’m crossing my fingers C7 is where the energy sits....

Feeling sneezy again, and hot and flushed.

Mom is saying she sees everyone’s grandmothers sitting beside them.

Right ear itching and my nose feels numb and neck feels sore.

Breathe. Creation Myth. Sharp feeling in my nose again, stinging sensation, esp right nostril. Numbness left side of face.

It’s like a breeze is blowing through my head. Slight heartburn sensation.

In the beginning was the word. Prickling in left fingers. R wrist pricle. I want to eat the lactose.

Will I have to grind like this forever until the end of time?!

Is it the process that’s important or the end result? Maybe both. The shifting of energy can be magical and beautiful if you just take the time to stop and watch (just as

I write that I feel something shift and get lighter) The air now has a shimmery sheen to it, like a glow and it looks quite magical and beautiful. Am I seeing the molecules in the air?

Maybe just the energetic imprint. Dry feeling in my throat (get more water)

What do you cure?

I feel like part of this is about impatience. It can cure the need to rush, the need to be too busy in one’s life, not taking the time to watch the clouds go by, to pay attention to nature

and its beauty, not taking the time to smell the roses.

#2: There’s a language for everything.

We want results now. When we don’t get results we get annoyed. This remedy can teach us to go with the flow. I’m talking about pellet provings being too slow. Everything is

a process.

Throat feels dry. There’s a communication piece too. We need to talk more and speak our truth, when that is blocked this remedy could be needed.

It’s about how you see it, perspective, how you’re voicing it.

It’s all about your point of view. Seeing things in a positive light, as a chance for learning and growth, changes everything, and life becomes less difficult and less of a struggle if you

see life that way.

Sahara comes out of the room, sits down beside me and draws a heart with wings, then she draws some stars (giggling as she draws them).

#4: at the end, something popped into my head. I have to hire someone, it’s awkward to hire now, why don’t I just wait instead of hiring in between, wait till I get back, rather than

trying to juggle everything, slower and more thoughtful rather than rushing.

After the Trituration: Prover #2

November 15

There is definitely the feeling of not wanting to share everything, almost like it is too horrible to see through to the truth. Almost like I could not tell what was the remedy and what

was me and I did not want to say it for fear that it would be me or my stuff and not the remedy and everyone would find out that my life is not all peace and glory, so weird because

in other provings I have no problem expressing the weirdness. Like this remedy rings true to home and bares all!

I was in the bath and saw my body under the water and then saw it as cold and dead, creepy feeling, but also mesmerizing, I did get out of the tub and just watched, the pale color

of my legs the swollen texture (which normally I look alive and feel alive) this was like a suicide feeling, I even was thinking about why people would choose to have a suicide that

way and then I thought maybe if they slit their wrists in the tub of water the water takes the blood away and the bathroom is left clean, and then I thought about the blood splurting

and how they would have to have the wrist under the water to stop this I think it can be a very deep remedy filled with a desire to die.

Then after that son was in the tub bathing and he was floating face down and I got horrible imagery of him lying there drowned. I actually watched for half a second to make sure that

his body was moving and then I saw the tap above his head and thought that he better not bump his head or he may really drown, then about 5 min later he did bump his head! I told

him to ‘swim’ the other way in the tub. Quite a theme of fear of drowning and imagery of drowned bodies.

I think we could have gone to C8

Both son and daughter were complaining of heartburn yesterday and son had a really sore sternum, daughter’s sinus’ are blocked too.

November 16

D was walking into the house after being at the gym yesterday and immediately got a pain in his right nostril with burning that makes his right eye water, lots of sneezing and dripping

of clear liquid. He says that he is not sick it is just his nostril that hurts and causing the sneezing)

After the Trituration: Prover #3

November 14

hmmmmm, I can see that.. a detox effect.

The words that come up for me: cleansing and purify I was telling my sister about our trituration adventure and what came up as an important theme for me was the 'blank mind' that

happened in C6 I think... blank slate (thus, cleansed, pure) blank canvas, pure thought (no thought, actually!) the idea that it's that 'clear mind' state they want us to get to in

meditation.... this seems really relevant right now.

November 15 -hacked up 2 mucous balls today- voice is SO tired... i sound frog-like (had my recording session yesterday and it was very 'trying') -generally fatigued and just want to

go to bed- dry back of throat and nasal cavity.

November 16

- throat full of guck upon waking. voice is SO scratchy/rough/hoarse! - as though I've had a terrible cold - speaking my Truth aloud has been a trend, now that I think of it.

Yes, more in the past few months but very specifically in the days around this trituration (historically I am reserved, quiet, not wanting to cause a fuss). This remedy brought my

"no longer-able-to-remain - silent" feeling to the forefront - sore throat today. voice HOARSE!

After the Trituration: Sonya

November 14 (day after trituration)

Lots of sinus congestion, thick white and yellow mucus difficult to blow out. Sahara has the congestion too (is staying home from school today) but doesn’t have as much mucus as I do.

While potentizing to C7/40 Level:

Ears start to hurt (l.) (combined with sinus congestion)

Feeling like I’m outside of time, everything seems very still.

Pain in my neck.

I feel like I know how Hahnemann made his remedies now, how he was able to gauge what energy to stop at (e.g. 6C, 12C, 30C, etc)

As I near the 40C the energy changes, to a pleasing octave.

The sun shines on my face.

Feel like I’m sinking.

Nature is beautiful, and I’m appreciating it.

I feel absolutely peaceful, calm and still .

Later tonight.

Could/should we have gone to the C8 level? Maybe, but I think the C7 will do. I took the potentized 40C remedy today and felt like it sent a ripple through me. It’s like the ripple takes

awhile to go through you and you don’t feel the effects immediately - it can be subtle but deep and it could be slow.

#2 emailed me telling me she did not tell the whole story of her family troubles in her notes (will email me more details later tonight).

After her email, I realized that I was not completely forthcoming with my notes either.

In C6 I had this very harsh burning sensation in my nostrils, very intense. At the time I was thinking to myself that it felt exactly like snorting a hallucinogenic research chemical

(it was called 2ct7), something I did a number of times years ago in my early 20’s. People who knew about this research chemical always warned about how harsh it was to snort it, but

we still did it because it was hard to get and very expensive (too expensive to “waste” by taking in pill form). So we would do lines of it -it felt like razor blades cutting the insides of my nostrils-

I would writhe on the floor it was so painful.

We went to the c7 and the research chem I was into was c7, is there a connection (?)

I feel like the water trituration sparked a detox of the leftover 2ct7 left over in my nostrils (and subsequent brain damage?) from so long ago. I remember reading that snorting drugs can change

the inside of your nostrils somehow, the mucus membrane. Maybe my nostrils and brain are getting the chance to start over again.

November 15

Last night the only dream I can remember is I took someone else’s baby and I was told to let him suck on my breast even though I had no milk because it was not my baby.

U had a dream of strolling along the water, saw a boat, then he went for a swim. Also he was going to introduce a sister of a friend of his (who doesn’t have a sister in real life though) to his family.

Lately I’ve been reading lots about how to transfer the energy of a remedy into a patient (without them taking the remedy), and why that might be useful. I found Heart Resonance,

the founder is planning a trip to Mount Shasta and the idea really appealed to me (this was around the time I gathered the water).

Now, that is not really resonating with me so I am wondering if all this searching, desire to travel, wanderlust basically was an effect of the proving. Also, U took up soccer around the time

of the gathering of the water. He’d been putting it off forever and finally decided to act.

I am very tired and keep craving sugar..

Hmm...I just realized, maybe it’s about really solidifying my identity as a homeopath. I was looking into doing other therapies but homeopathy is really enough, much more than enough

(in fact, taken over a lot of my life and I like it that way). Being satisfied with what I’m doing now and not needing more.

Water is H2O.....hydrogen and oxygen. According to Scholten Hydrogen is about Incarnation (to be or not to be). Maybe that’s where Shakespeare comes in. Oxygen is on the row of self worth.

I wonder if I was questioning my worth as a homeopath(?)

The concept of fluid identity comes to mind with this remedy.

November 16

Last night dreamed of being by the water, and we were driving from town to town by the seaside. Lots of sneezing today! Reminds me of hayfever.

Met with an old friend who has had some hypnosis training as well as heart resonance. When she started talking about hypnosis she talked a lot about the subconscious and about wanting to

be reborn. I wonder if I was drawn to hypnosis recently because it’s about accessing the subconscious?()

November 18

More dreams of being by the water, U had a dream of kayaking U has had stinging burning sensation in both nostrils the last few days, and sneezing I notice my nasal congestion < at night (definitely a worse night modality)

November 19

Dream last night of having a deep, round hole in my skin after having a blemish that wouldn’t heal, it was perfectly round, red and very ugly.

I have the feeling of my brain having been wiped, not erased but cleaned. They say (e.g. Tinus Smits says) the nose is the drain of the brain and if that is so I feel like I have new brain cells and any brain damage caused from mistakes in my youth have been erased.

November 25

For a few days leading up to my period I had very sore breasts. What was unusual was how many days it lasted and how sore they were - definitely worse then usual symptoms.

Still a bit of congestion and it has definitely been worse left side.

November 26

There are eruptions that look like bug bites (raised, swollen) on my right hand and arm - also one on my left arm and the right side of my neck.

Congestion worse again and I wonder if it was partially alcohol to blame.

Last night dream of being in a house in the wild somewhere at the top of a hill. There were wolves at the bottom of the hill and they kept running up the hill and coming into the house through

an opening - I was worried for my safety.

Noticed my congestion was better when I went outside into rainy weather and got worse when I went inside. If my throat gets too dry I cough (dry cough).

November 28

U dream: I had done a quick course in music and decided to teach music, and U was mad I rushed into doing it without proper training, one of his friends was learning music from me and U

was warning him I wasn’t properly qualified. Also I was dressing provocatively for the music lessons and U and I were having sex before/after the lessons so sex was a theme.

The other night I had a dream that I was with a large number of U’s family members, I remember us singing something together.

December 5

Over the past weekend I woke up with a headache one day and another day had random head pains on random spots on my head. Right now as I type this I am feeling a tingling sensation at

the crown of my head.

Today as I was talking with my friend I told her I feel like I am surrounded by crazy people.

A relative’s husband, who she is now separated from, I just found out, was and is suffering from severe depression. He seemed normal when I would see him, but suffered from severe mood

swings and alcoholism.

There’s a part of me that doesn’t want to reveal these things.

I want this proving to be anonymous.

These things are too private to reveal.

A friend of mine who only a little while ago was sane has now gone, as far as I can tell, insane. I feel like she is an alien, too strange and cultish to relate too. If you’re not part of her cultish beliefs there is nothing to talk about with her.

A friend’s boyfriend threatened to kill her. He had a psychotic break. Her future father in law is a psychic of sorts, predicting a future for my friend that is scary and most likely not real.

The idea came up during the conversation, are some of the people in the alternative health field insane?

They see things, entities, etc. For example, the creator of heart resonance, which I was so drawn to a few weeks ago. He had a history of childhood abuse and now sees entities.

My friend has noticed that people who have been traumatized in their life can often have mental illness.

Some of those people can also have hallucinations. If the person is unable or unwilling to deal with that trauma, they could go insane from the effort of suppressing that trauma. The brain compartmentalizes the trauma, resulting in a stress in another part of the brain, because something’s got to give. Those traumatized people wish they could be Dolls, that their memory could

be completely erased. But the brain doesn’t really work like that.

But wait, maybe it does sometimes. Maybe there are people who get neurodegenerative brain disorders who have had trauma in their past, and they really truly can forget that past (Alzheimers).

Somehow, their brains are able to shut down so that the past can be forgotten (I’m thinking of my grandmother now, who died from a degenerative brain condition, there were memories from WW2 that were painful for her). Hmm...not quite right because her memories were intact. However, it is the nervous system that was affected for her.

December 6

When people do drugs, aren’t they trying to erase a memory, push it down just to have fun. Because their real life without the drugs is not that fun. Self medication. That sort of thing can be done

in the natural health field as well. Push away the negative thoughts and only “think happy” all the time (The Secret). If we try to live in the positive and deny the negative, that’s not balanced.

The question has been posed: why do we have to do this? Why do we have to go through the negative stuff to understand the remedy? That’s because we need to understand all aspects of a remedy. And it’s OK to go through the negative stuff, to face that side of the remedy, because that’s the truth of the remedy.

Each time we go down the rabbit hole, all we’re doing is meeting aspects of ourselves. Some may see that as scary or dangerous, but I find it an adventure, a type of exploration of one’s own psyche.

December 8

Dreamed of situation from my past, I went to sit down on a bench and there were some people beside me and though it was slightly altered it reminded me of an issue from my past. I came face

to face with it without fear or judging myself.

We can make choices, and things happen to us - some of it just seems to be fate, some of it based on choice. I guess you can say, when you are younger, you may have made some poor choices out

of ignorance.

I lived with so much emotional pain and confusion in the past. It was a bit like being in a nightmare -I was asleep and powerless to change anything- or so I thought. Sometimes we are trapped in

the limitations of our own mind.

I feel like I’ve come so far. I am growing as a person and willing to face my issues head on, whereas the “old way” would’ve been to try to stuff them down or pretend they don’t exist. Facing the past with honesty gives me hope of a better future.

When I woke up this morning from that dream my brain felt cleansed. I blew mucus (clear pus) from my nose and am continuing to do this morning. It’s not possible to erase the past but it is possible to gain a different perspective on life, to grow and to transform as a person.

December 9

As I get closer to finishing this document, I periodically experience short, sharp intense pains in various parts of my head, never lingering too long. Headache and nerve pain come to mind.

Lots of autism clients this week, very little else (2 phone calls today, both autism).

December 10

I finally understand the meaning of the phrase “I am my own worst enemy.”

December 11

Looked up Renaissance poetry (promised myself to look it up later when I had time). Why Renaissance

poetry during the trituration?

Because this poetry transcends time and space through the power of imagination. It says that the world of the imagination is superior to the corporeal world, a big theme of the remedy (and its affinity for the mind vs. the body). There is also a theory in this poetry that the imagination can bring healing in times of psychological pain.

Hamlet’s opinion -caught between the balance of knowledge and ignorance concerning his father’s death- not knowing the truth (goes back to Socrates). Opinion is neither fact nor pure ignorance,

it hangs in the balance.

Renaissance poetry mirrors universal experiences

A friend last night was talking at a party about Iboga (ibogaine) therapy for drug addicts.

It’s a hallucinogenic drug.

It helps the addict’s mind access traumas from the past so they can be dealt with, then they can overcome their addiction.

Seems like homeopathic water would work a lot like ibogaine, but cheaper (homeopathy is known to be very cost effective).

November 20, 2012: Potentizing from 40C to 220C,


Water = life

Could revive someone near death

Suicidal tendencies

Neurological damage from toxins


Bottomless - goes deep

Emotional breakdown “Going crazy”

Losing it

Glass half empty/full

Memory loss

Confusion/old age/dementia

Serious pathologies

Vaccine damage



Vorwort/Suchen                                Zeichen/Abkürzungen                                    Impressum