Aqua XwMuthkwium = Musqueam Creek Water
Vergleich: Siehe: Aquae allgemein
[Sonja Mc Leod]
One side (l.)
Dryness
>: Water (Moisturizers, Rain, Washing)
Remembering
Miasm: Tubercular
Major Themes
Tubercular Miasm:
Restless & Scattered, Moving from Place to Place
There is a scattered energy to this remedy, flitting from place to place
with lots of energy (also the opposite, extreme tiredness).
The idea of taking a long journey down a meandering path was a theme of
this remedy.
Provers
had a desire for activity and there is a dissatisfied flightiness to the
remedy as well, not wanting to stay with any one thing (DD.: Tuberculinum/ADHS).
There can be a lot of anger and irritability but it comes and goes very
quickly.
Nerve pain also came and went quickly, moving from place to place all
over the body.
This theme relates to the overactive nervous system (see below).
Emotional or Physical Trauma leads to Brain Damage
This could be a good remedy for children with neurological brain
disorders such as autism, sensory processing disorder or ADHD, because most of
these types of
disorders can be traced back to either emotional trauma in the mother,
toxins from pharmaceuticals or vaccines.
This could also be a good remedy for adults with neurological disorders such as multiple sclerosis, Alzheimers,
dementia, Parkinson’s disease, or migraines (when there has been abuse or
emotional trauma or if there is a toxic component in the case. People suffering
from psychiatric brain disorders such as chronic depression, schizophrenia and
manic depressive/bipolar disorders could also
benefit. There was also a theme of suicide and preoccupation with death
in the remedy, which is usually a common symptom for sufferers of chronic
depression, schizophrenia and bipolar.
Also a remedy that could be indicated after a stroke resulting in
neurological damage. Or a car crash where there has been trauma to the head.
Diving into the Subconscious: Expression not Suppression
Water can help the client express themselves and speak their truth.
This remedy can bring up suppressed memories, thoughts and feelings so
that healing can take place. The client can take an honest look into their
subconscious; water tranquilizes an agitated mind
(an overactive nervous system) so that the client can view their past
trauma in a less emotional, more matter of fact way.
Accepting the dark side of one’s past leads to personal growth and
transformation, a peaceful mind and a better future.
The client now has a chance to start over and begin again.
The subconscious is often expressed in dreams, so delving into the
dreams of a client needing this remedy would be helpful to give them more
awareness of their issues.
A remedy with deep action because of its affinity for the brain and
nervous system. Brings past trauma to the surface so one should be mindful and
cautious with a client who is not ready or unwilling to go that deep.
Memory Loss:
Remembering/Forgetting the Past
Remembering the past, dreams about the past. Ancestral themes,
grandmother energy.
There may be a history of a traumatic past or abuse, accompanied by a
sense of guilt and a wish to forget the past.
For example, there may be self-medication with alcohol, recreational or
pharmaceutical drugs, or denial of negative experience via positiveeir past
trauma in a calm, objective, non-judgmental way so that healing and
transformation can take place. new-agey affirmations and meditations.
The therapeutic action of this remedy could look similar to ibogaine
(Iboga) therapy for drug addicts.
Like a tranquilizer, this remedy has the ability calm and soothe
frazzled nerves (an overactive nervous system), making it easier to face
traumas from the past. Neurological disorders passed down the
family (genetic) line, or unresolved neurological damage or trauma that
has been suppressed by a family member, only to resurface in subsequent
generations.
This remedy could also assist somebody with memory loss, either caused
by physical trauma to the brain or emotional trauma (with diagnosis of brain
damage, dementia, Alzheimer’s, etc).
Dirty/Guilt/Sin
A client needing this remedy may have the feeling that they have done
something wrong, of guilt, like they have sinned in some way. This is a common feeling
of victims of trauma
such as rape or abuse victims.
Cleansing/Rebirth/Transformation
Related to the feeling of being dirty is the idea of cleansing. The
client has toxic injury or a trauma in the past, which has altered their brain
structure, leaving it damaged and unclean. Once the remedy is given, an
internal cleansing will take place, likely resulting in a skin eruption or
mucus discharge through the nose - it is very important not to suppress the
discharge as it is a sign of healing.
It’s not possible to erase the past completely but it is possible to
gain a calm, matter of fact, non-judgemental perspective on one’s past in order
to cleanse, transform and move forward with life.
Allergic & Immunity Symptoms: Skin Complaints & ENT (Ear, Nose,
Throat) Complaints
Skin complaints (e.g. cuts) slow to heal. Skin eruptions with itching
that can be so intense that one scratches until it bleeds. There was also a lot
of sneezing and irritation in the nostrils, and sometimes the throat, with a
lot of mucus.
Provers also experienced blocked ears. These symptoms are typical
symptoms of allergy, hayfever, colds & flus. These symptoms are tied to the
cleansing aspect of the remedy. After giving this remedy, neurological symptoms
will start to improve and cleansing will take place through the skin and mucus
membranes - do not suppress this cleansing reaction.
Several provers also experienced symptoms of heartburn + burping.
Heartburn is a common symptom of an overactive nervous system.
Bladder Symptoms
This remedy can cause symptoms similar to cystitis: the frequent urge to
pee, inflammation, chills and painful urination.
Overactive Nervous System Themes
Sensuality/Touch
All provers noted the sensuality of this remedy. One prover felt a cool
breeze flowing over her body during the proving.
An overactive nervous system: children with autism and Sensory
Processing Disorder often have issues with touch.
Off-Balance:
Vertigo, Incoordination, Nausea and Vomiting
There was vertigo and light-headedness sometimes + nausea and vomiting.
It felt a bit like being on a small boat, so this can be a useful remedy for
seasickness.
There was clumsiness, slipping, and incoordination. Could look like MS
or Parkinson’s.
Nerve Pain
Pains were typically short and stabbing in various places: head,
abdominal area, extremities and spine (DD.: Hyper)
The nerve pain sometimes alternated with numbness.
Could be a good remedy for carpal tunnel syndrome, fibromyalgia,
sciatica and migraine headaches.
Nervousness & Agitation
This remedy has the ability to calm and soothe an irritable, agitated
person with an overactive nervous system.
Other Physicals
Tendency towards constipation
Sore breasts
Heart trouble
SRP: Delusion of a cool breeze blowing all over body
Dry cough
Other Themes & Imagery
Insects (SPIDERS, Mosquitos, Cockroaches)
Useful as an Acute or Intercurrent Remedy for: Seasickness, Cystitis
General cleansing from drugs or toxins
To open up a case and bring past issues to the surface
Remedy Nucleus
Polycrest for neurological disorders: autism, ADHD, multiple sclerosis,
schizophrenia, migraines, etc.
Cleanses the brain from toxins, injury or past trauma/abuse
Rebirth: brings subconscious issues to the surface, calms & aids in
personal transformation
Overactive nervous system (agitation, nerve pain, vertigo with nausea,
incoordination)
Tubercular miasm (scattered & restless)
Trituration Proving
Before the Trituration:
Prover # 3’s Journal
November 8, 2011
Dream: last night at my now deceased baba’s house. Wanted strawberry
homemade jam; knew where it ought to be except there was none, cleaning
products there instead; didn’t want
to wake anybody up - it was a nightmare. Disappointed.
This morning, while rifling through cabinet, non-purposefully (sort of
tidying dishes) at the very back I spot a homemade jar of strawberry jam –
exactly as I had wanted. Yes!
I thought I’d used up or given away
all the jam I made. Happy to find some <3
Last few days and weeks – keep seeing something dark (small, cat-size)
to my left – just out of peripheral ... I turn to look .... Nothing. It’s not
good or bad....just is.
.............................................................
Earlier (Nov 4?)
Having a moment of “what am I going to do?!” Despair, low self worth,
money worries, life direction! Just while going to bed. Finally decided to hand
it over to Universe for help, guidance.
Went to sleep.
Next morning:
Wake up, decided not to make any “decisions” today, just follow what’s
shown to me, my inner pulse...intuition. No left brain logic! Then hubby
announces “We’re going to France.”
He’s reading email. I am in love with France. I’ve always wanted to go.
Of late I’ve been saying out loud that if we can figure a way to go for a few
months “taste test” – we’d for sure do it.
Voila! Am invited by friend D. Awesome!
All for an “ashram labor” fee (whoo!!)
November 11, 2011:
11/11/11
Lots of unpleasant dreams this morning. One after another. Despite going
to bed at a reasonable hour, I am sleepy. Tired. Emotion. Remembrance Day. My
skin refuses to heal. Hangnails.
Paper cuts. A week ago I drank ¾ cup of regular 2% milk. My face
(chin/jaw “lower half”) broke out. Several “underground” painful pimples. This
is a common reaction to milk for me, but they refuse to heal! -not common. Just
noticing now - seems to be all on right side of face - open. Exposed - vulnerable - raw.
Been quite hungry lately. Growls in morning.
Creative output. REALLY wanting to integrate new (old, actually) more
vibrant vocabulary into my writing. Dictionary, thesaurus have been my friends.
Dr Emoto’s (from him signed) book is floating around my desk. LOVE HIS
WORK.
I feel like there’s so much to do! In an excited (usually) way - like
“let’s go, people!” And at night it feels overwhelming and can push me to
anxiety.
2 of 3 mayoral candidates for my city have personally called upon me,
inviting me to have tea and understand them (= win their vote). This is quite
specific and amazing. They’ve taken note of the voice
I had over that last rezoning debacle, it seems.
I refuse to be quiet and unexpressed. NEVER again.
Oh right - breasts super sensitive at least 3 times now, noticed sharp, stabbing
in ovaries(?) the right lower abdomen anyway...enough to make me double over
for a second. Itchy small of back.
Before the Trituration:
Prover #2’s Journal
same pattern. We do not know if she will keep the baby or not but she is
already 7 weeks and it definitely gets harder the longer she waits.
I already knew that Y is pregnant. She is 23 and I was emailing her but
wanted her to tell me so I just asked how she was doing and she started to tell
me the horrors that she has created in her life. She told me that she was going
to be evicted from her house so she decided to sell drugs and got busted with a
lot in her possession. She said that the worse thing for her case is that she
does not do them so they look at that worse. Anyways she is looking at house
arrest! At least I am praying that she gets house arrest with the baby coming.
She is happy about her baby.
Then I found out Z has heart trouble has to have open heart surgery and
very soon! He is very stubborn and does not want to do it, probably does not
want to be here on earth anymore, lots of people are choosing to leave.
As I share this it does not feel light at all but that is ok
Then there was all the stuff about the interdimensional BS! I was
getting flashes of another life that I have lived, and because everything
happens simultaneously anyways I am living it and it was just really weird.
Before the Trituration:
Prover #3’s Journal
Health Matters
Broken tooth (Oct 23)
Knee (leg) - right side
Bone/healing
Heart issues - clogged arteries
Dreams: about the past. Tenderness/compassion/sensuous
Before the Trituration:
Sonya’s Journal
November
3, 2011
Gathered the water today.
I feel a stillness. Sensation of coolness in my hands. And was getting
twinges on my left shoulder, then my right shoulder.
Hubby: nausea, aches and pains, teeth chattering, needs a lot of
blankets. He mentioned bladder infections (maybe useful for an acute).
Me: I keep getting this sensation of a cool breeze blowing over me. And
wandering pains, here and there, all over my body.
November 6
For a few days now have had this dot on my right shoulder, not raised
but a little redness and it hurts when I touch out. Seems to be skin not muscle
related.
U has had some itching and rash for the last few nights with scratching.
He’s also had increased urination (at night). Poos have been more solid for him
and for me as well, a little on the
constipated side.
Dream: last night of riding on a skateboard, sliding easily around the
road, twisting and turning.
U’s sleep has been very bad, and I have been feeling tired earlier, #4
has also felt more tired.
U had a rough night last night.
Dream: being in a town/village, worried about people committing suicide.
If one person committed suicide, worried that others would commit
suicide, kind of like a dam bursting. Another dream about being concerned that
our town would flood.
Intense itching all night long, only better after applying cream. There
are welts all over his body (raised) and the itching/welts are worse around his
ankle and heel area. He thought he might die
from the itching, like a horror movie, like he is under the illusion
that he’s covered by spiders and he will claw himself to death, never ending
continuous itching like he would slough his skin away everywhere.
November 7
Last night dream of someone from my past showing a photograph of me he
had taken of me in the past to my parents - he was a “boy I had liked” in the
past, I had never told him my feelings.
Another dream of being in a town/village on a snowy mountain, driving
around etc.
Next dream: being with a group of people, some were past friends, we
were trying to complete a task, a bit like Amazing race - we went to Safeway
and had to communicate with an authority
from outside the store by phone (like a payphone but free). There was a
bit of a division in the group, some members went off somewhere, I remember
going off to look at some plants outside
the store (I remember eating some dirt as well?!) I tried to pick up the
phone and communicate but the person on the other end hung up, then another
group member had to try....
November 8
Feeling a lot sleepier lately (wanting to go to bed earlier). Waking up
a few times per night but going back to sleep fairly easily, as I feel tired.
Blowing my nose and getting some nasal blockage/discharge the last day
or so, worse left sinus.
Last night had lots of dreams but feeling too lazy to write them down in
the middle of the night so forgot most of them.
The one dream I remember: I was in a massive hotel suite with my mom.
For some reason, soon before we arrived they’d had to move the whole hotel to
another building. That’s why the rooms in
our building seemed odd, because the building wasn’t built to be a
hotel.
November 9
I dreamt a lot but remembered none.
I’ve been noticing more abdominal cramping, especially in the middle of
the night or upon waking. I do sometimes get this but it seems to have
increased, plus doesn’t seem to be related to eating.
The sneezing and coryza continues, with clear or white discharge. It
seems to be worse when I’m downstairs, closer to the creek water I gathered.
Getting a lot of thoughts about incidents from the past, just floating
through my mind. Memories of past incidents, past people I knew, etc. It’s like
a catalogue of past events going through my mind.
Also noticed that I can get irritated and very grouchy very suddenly,
and then the next moment feel fine and agreeable. The emotion doesn’t really
stay with me for long.
Had a dream sometime before the trituration about walking along a path
in the mountains to a Mecca-like location (desert). I remember the walk being
very long and I was worried about getting there and back before dark. I had had
the option of taking transportation but had chosen to walk because I didn’t
know it would be such a long walk.
Musqueam Creek Water Trituration Notes (November 12, 2011)
C1: Sonya
Water swirling whoosh. Fast. Smooth. Life journey.
Prickle in left nostril. Circle of life. I feel the wind blowing. Rain
is smooth.
#4: Native connection? Creek is on Musqueam land. We’re on Native land.
Rain falling, falling, falling. Cycle of life. Rain falls, then goes up
to the sky. Comes back down.
I see a flood of water. Water everywhere. On the ground. Giant puddles.
Whirlwind. Splash. Big bursts of water. Snow. When water freezes it becomes
ice. Avalanche. Rain and snow fall downwards. Then evaporate upward. So much
movement. Always moving, fluid not solid.
Pain in left side of neck.
#2: (re: her water bottle, takes the lid off) :This water does not want
to be contained!
The water flows through my memories, like it flows through life,
drifting...Every single memory, retrospective, it won’t let us forget. Every
single memory we have is a part of us. It’s what makes us who we are. We can
try to forget but it won’t let us. Anything we try to suppress will float to
the surface. A mirror. Reflecting our life, without judgement, it just is. This
is truth, this is our life. With no emotion attached to it. (tight feeling in
ribcage above my stomach).
Conversation about having girls vs. boys. Apparently families with 2
girls are happiest, with boy and girl
2nd happiest, hardest with all boys. (both me and #2 have to
break for pee) #3 is wearing an orange t-shirt, blue scarf and purple jacket.
Usually would not wear so many colours together.
I see a woman. Water Nymph. Her eyes are deep blue. Galadriel comes to
mind. She is wise and all-knowing and sits at the side of the creek on the
rocks. If you look closely you
can see me, I am always there. Sitting, waiting.
Are you human?
No. Long ago when the world was magical, you saw me and you wrote
stories. The Musqueam still visit, they see me and talk to me. We laugh and
chat and visit for awhile. They still believe in magic. They are the only ones
who visit me. Sometimes I get lonely, sitting here and waiting. Sometimes
animals will visit – dogs and fish.
Finding it hard to focus. To focus, you have to stick with one thing.
Themes about the past: just random thoughts about the past popping.
#2 dyed her hair bright pink a week ago (wondered if she should go
rainbow)
C1:
Prover #2
When we drove in today we took a meandering trail instead of going our
usual path.
Time seemed to slow down for us.
As they begin to grind I can feel a chill on my shoulders.
I can feel the water spirit watching.
As if from behind and over
Just watching
Swaying
I can feel the energy begin to tingle through my veins.
My hands have a restlessness, circling in movement, shaking them out
dissipates it.
It is as if every mineral in my physical body is alive, open mouthed,
calling.
Breathing in deeply
Quite a lot of energy.
Pain in my right knee
Really jittery, more nervous system.
Deep breaths help.
Ah ha ha ha sound.
Tingles up the back of my neck, like someone is bruising my hair with
hands.
Very sensual, movement quality.
The bridge between the solar plexus and <3 is open, stimulated.
Divas
Twirly
Twirling around
Dancing
Always moving
No boundaries
Images of animals large and small drinking, satisfying their thirst
Apparently not just the little animals
I am thirsty too
My eyelids have a burning sensation, just slightly behind them
Thoughts fleeting escaping coming and going so swiftly like I can’t
quite grab them.
There is a lightness to this energy, as if my body is cold and floating.
Almost is a state of nothingness
Nothing and everything all at once.
Purpose destination but no substance.
I feel like sighing, not mournfully but contentedly, drifting lazily
along
As if being stared right through I don’t quite exist
Transparent
It is only that which is around me forms what I am that reflects my
purpose
Burning point in my left of sternum.
It feels like a touchy feely substance
Wants to be caressed, massaged
Tactile
Dancing, Prancing
Chest
The pain is like a spot just left of the sternum.
Rubbing it makes it better
Feeling like I don’t want to be confined, want to run away.
Move, keep moving, sitting still like torture, stagnant.
Thank heavens for muscles, even the act of flexing them makes the
fidgety, restless confinement go easier.
Feel like I have to move, rock, flex - quick repeated movement, feels
better.
It’s funny when the water spirit came it was a male energy and the divas
feel female in energy and are many
Sparkling, dancing
Now the chest spot moved over to the right side, same as before just
different side
Ears subtle plugging
Frequency adjusting
Barnacle
Very difficult to grasp this energy.
It slips right through
Dreams of past.
Watched Dollhouse last week. Crazy show, a lot of violence. They have
technology that erases your brain and memories and can imprint any personality
they want,
they join the dollhouse, will give 5 years of
their life. Multimillion dollar company, if they’re rich enough they can
have a doll for their fantasy. They will get the dolls to be a special agent to
retrieve something that’s lost.
Watched it this week, aggressive and violent. The thoughts flow out and
the memories, they have no memory of who they are.
C1: Prover #4
Broken sleep (grandmother), headache
Grandmother presence - feeling - ancestral
Slight - birds = 2 elements - air and water
Family healing, wounding
Connecting
Sleepy
Trust (strangers) kindness (welcoming)
Headache - emptying from top
Breathe, bathe, balance
Birds: flight (playfulness), feeling, freeing, flowing
4 + 2 - responsibility
Eyes - tightness, jaw
Rest
Children
Changing (transforming) Don’t like, I’m bored
Capable
Heartburn
Slow moving, slow gradual changes, gentleness
Ancient
Reflective, feminine, slow moving, world wide
C1: Prover #3
Right ear. Dull block.
Right side of face tingle dull (at the same time?!)
Lightness.
Ease. Easy. Sahara says feel like eating chocolate cake -yes- that light
easy feeling of cake
Light blue glitter
Ocean
Light relaxed easy going feeling. Playful. Lalala
Every color. One.
I had to wear all these colors today. It’s a little crazy, this combo.
Circular
Water. Heh. This is funny. Of course it’s wet. I could pack it like
sand.
Itchy nose.
Water bottle falls. Ooh! OK
Silly. Free. Fluid. I want to join.
Let’s go! An adventure....
Look, all the things we can see.
Everywhere. We are connected.
We are source. All light, all colour, all source. Isn’t it so pretty.
Feminine. But balanced.
Forever. Circles. Curl.
However you think it is, it is
Physical? Sure, but that’s not our focus here. Other dimension. Unseen.
I like the dinging pinging sound.
Bells. Drums. Symphony.
All nature comes alive with us.
Glitter sparkle. Rainbow color.
Essence. Life light.
Pituitary gland must be yellow and blue. I just forgot but now I see the
combo and remember.
Difference between ducks and goose?
Really! How is it divided up?
Just let it flow! Whooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Still itchy face. Centre.
ORANGE. COLOURS!
Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Doesn’t matter, free to flow.
Just make color.
Cahloor
C Kuler
Color c kuhler
Collar. In soundse....
All mean something you call them words. It’s essence. Calling it forth.
To name it.
I don’t trust that timer. Technology...
Hmmm....It’s not real.
Pronounce.
I am everything
Itchy right face center
This could save the world.
Well that’s no small feat. But it’s time
Slippery this morning. Almost fall down.
Fluid.
Water everywhere. Are you getting it yet?
I feel no need to be tidy, neat. “Structured”
I can just write wherever....
However on the page
No mind. DON’T HAVE TO USE THE LINES
Hehehehe so funny. Don’t have to use lines. But writing in the lines.
Pop. We make pop corn pop.
I am explosive. Soft. Nurturing. All, ALL.
The yellow leaf
All floating for a time
Time and space distorted
C7: Prover #3
Water -you’ve pushed us downstream here- what is it you wish to
communicate?
Water can exist in so many forms, so many states. Infinitely adaptable.
Always can get around any block.
Flows through it, or around it, or dissolves it, erodes it. But always
it will move forward. Can never be
stopped. Even dams and rocks break down.
Dryness, dusty, dehydrated in throat.
Water, because it is infinite, could carry us forever. Ever deeper.
Sometimes words are unnecessary. Just to be in quietude.
TO BE.
I believe we are in a State (vs. an identity) right now.
Objectivity. Is there such a thing and are we there? Plying the waters
of ________________
Fathoms deep. We are asked to trust our own wisdom instead of seeking it
outside of self or first taking others’ advice over our own wisdom’s guidance.
Must we question so much? (a question – LOL). Really, so much is so
simple we needn’t complicate it by trying to describe it.
Like - try to describe “blue” without referencing COLOR - how could
someone understand blue if you’re using color to describe color? Oh –
OK. Stop. Too many words.
Scraping seems so long.
I would love a brilliant flash of insight except I think that comes when
necessary, and right now...there isn’t a pressing question.
Every colour is a pearl of wisdom.
Spectral Circle.
Full circle
Beauty
Essence
All colour. Every colour forever.
I want there to be a symphony - a grand and beautiful orchestration of
music and souls. All coming together united, unified, unity
Water is unity unity
Unity unity UNITY UNITY
Unity Unity Unity Unity Unity
Unity Unity Unity Unity Unity
Unity Unity
Unity Unity Unity All Unity
Think of the beautiful scents. Natural, floral...rose, lavender, orange,
bergamot.
Hmm. Pearl of wisom. Why do we say that? Pearls of the water. Now we
come to a point of Beauty. Beauty. So important and, in a patriarchal world, so
often overlooked.
Beauty, simply for beauty’s sake is healing.
Harmonizing.
Beauty can be found in so many places. Harmony can be found.
They can be created, generated.
I feel like swooping around a ballroom in a beautiful silken gown.
Waltzing in step with P. In harmony, in flow. Together but each in our roles.
Masculine and feminine in our
eternal dance.
Serene “Highness” <3
C7: Prover #4
About Connections
Left arm itchy - pay attention to the feminine
Grandmothers here, one with each person
Pain in lower (abdomen)/bandages wrapped around always conscious of my
chest area
Feel teary thinking about my grandmother
Last night with MIL - pleasant
Kaleidoscope rose
Stir - connection to “helper spirits”
Stopped stirring - heartburn back
Throat, stomach pain
Ask for help
Dark funnel out of my body (front)
Fear
Costume (masked) figure -behind me- put hand over my mouth - “don’t
speak”
Front teeth hurting - also middle ring finger of right hand
Avoiding arguments because of needing to be right
Throat itchy, abdomen sore
Bug in my car - abdomen
Caterpillar transforms into a butterfly
Statistics on illnesses
Answer to a question - pressing regarding work
C7: Sonya
Aysha’s left arm is itching, feels like she has a bug bite
Things feel a little lighter again,
I’m crossing my fingers C7 is where the energy sits....
Feeling sneezy again, and hot and flushed.
Mom is saying she sees everyone’s grandmothers sitting beside them.
Right ear itching and my nose feels numb and neck feels sore.
Breathe. Creation Myth. Sharp feeling in my nose again, stinging
sensation, esp right nostril. Numbness left side of face.
It’s like a breeze is blowing through my head. Slight heartburn
sensation.
In the beginning was the word. Prickling in left fingers. R wrist
pricle. I want to eat the lactose.
Will I have to grind like this forever until the end of time?!
Is it the process that’s important or the end result? Maybe both. The
shifting of energy can be magical and beautiful if you just take the time to
stop and watch (just as
I write that I feel something shift and get lighter) The air now has a
shimmery sheen to it, like a glow and it looks quite magical and beautiful. Am
I seeing the molecules in the air?
Maybe just the energetic imprint. Dry feeling in my throat (get more water)
What do you cure?
I feel like part of this is about impatience. It can cure the need to
rush, the need to be too busy in one’s life, not taking the time to watch the
clouds go by, to pay attention to nature
and its beauty, not taking the time to smell the roses.
#2: There’s a language for everything.
We want results now. When we don’t get results we get annoyed. This
remedy can teach us to go with the flow. I’m talking about pellet provings
being too slow. Everything is
a process.
Throat feels dry. There’s a communication piece too. We need to talk
more and speak our truth, when that is blocked this remedy could be needed.
It’s about how you see it, perspective, how you’re voicing it.
It’s all about your point of view. Seeing things in a positive light, as
a chance for learning and growth, changes everything, and life becomes less
difficult and less of a struggle if you
see life that way.
Sahara comes out of the room, sits down beside me and draws a heart with
wings, then she draws some stars (giggling as she draws them).
#4: at the end, something popped into my head. I have to hire someone,
it’s awkward to hire now, why don’t I just wait instead of hiring in between,
wait till I get back, rather than
trying to juggle everything, slower and more thoughtful rather than
rushing.
After the Trituration: Prover #2
November 15
There is definitely the feeling of not wanting to share everything,
almost like it is too horrible to see through to the truth. Almost like I could
not tell what was the remedy and what
was me and I did not want to say it for fear that it would be me or my
stuff and not the remedy and everyone would find out that my life is not all
peace and glory, so weird because
in other provings I have no problem expressing the weirdness. Like this
remedy rings true to home and bares all!
I was in the bath and saw my body under the water and then saw it as
cold and dead, creepy feeling, but also mesmerizing, I did get out of the tub
and just watched, the pale color
of my legs the swollen texture (which normally I look alive and feel
alive) this was like a suicide feeling, I even was thinking about why people
would choose to have a suicide that
way and then I thought maybe if they slit their wrists in the tub of water
the water takes the blood away and the bathroom is left clean, and then I
thought about the blood splurting
and how they would have to have the wrist under the water to stop this I
think it can be a very deep remedy filled with a desire to die.
Then after that son was in the tub bathing and he was floating face down
and I got horrible imagery of him lying there drowned. I actually watched for
half a second to make sure that
his body was moving and then I saw the tap above his head and thought
that he better not bump his head or he may really drown, then about 5 min later
he did bump his head! I told
him to ‘swim’ the other way in the tub. Quite a theme of fear of
drowning and imagery of drowned bodies.
I think we could have gone to C8
Both son and daughter were complaining of heartburn yesterday and son
had a really sore sternum, daughter’s sinus’ are blocked too.
November 16
D was walking into the house after being at the gym yesterday and
immediately got a pain in his right nostril with burning that makes his right
eye water, lots of sneezing and dripping
of clear liquid. He says that he is not sick it is just his nostril that
hurts and causing the sneezing)
After the Trituration: Prover #3
November 14
hmmmmm, I can see that.. a detox effect.
The words that come up for me: cleansing and purify I was telling my
sister about our trituration adventure and what came up as an important theme
for me was the 'blank mind' that
happened in C6 I think... blank slate (thus, cleansed, pure) blank
canvas, pure thought (no thought, actually!) the idea that it's that 'clear
mind' state they want us to get to in
meditation.... this seems really relevant right now.
November 15 -hacked up 2 mucous balls today- voice is SO tired... i
sound frog-like (had my recording session yesterday and it was very 'trying')
-generally fatigued and just want to
go to bed- dry back of throat and nasal cavity.
November 16
- throat full of guck upon waking. voice is SO scratchy/rough/hoarse! -
as though I've had a terrible cold - speaking my Truth aloud has been a trend,
now that I think of it.
Yes, more in the past few months but very specifically in the days
around this trituration (historically I am reserved, quiet, not wanting to
cause a fuss). This remedy brought my
"no longer-able-to-remain - silent" feeling to the forefront -
sore throat today. voice HOARSE!
After the Trituration: Sonya
November 14 (day after trituration)
Lots of sinus congestion, thick white and yellow mucus difficult to blow
out. Sahara has the congestion too (is staying home from school today) but
doesn’t have as much mucus as I do.
While potentizing to C7/40 Level:
Ears start to hurt (l.) (combined with sinus congestion)
Feeling like I’m outside of time, everything seems very still.
Pain in my neck.
I feel like I know how Hahnemann made his remedies now, how he was able
to gauge what energy to stop at (e.g. 6C, 12C, 30C, etc)
As I near the 40C the energy changes, to a pleasing octave.
The sun shines on my face.
Feel like I’m sinking.
Nature is beautiful, and I’m appreciating it.
I feel absolutely peaceful, calm and still .
Later tonight.
Could/should we have gone to the C8 level? Maybe, but I think the C7
will do. I took the potentized 40C remedy today and felt like it sent a ripple
through me. It’s like the ripple takes
awhile to go through you and you don’t feel the effects immediately - it
can be subtle but deep and it could be slow.
#2 emailed me telling me she did not tell the whole story of her family
troubles in her notes (will email me more details later tonight).
After her email, I realized that I was not completely forthcoming with
my notes either.
In C6 I had this very harsh burning sensation in my nostrils, very
intense. At the time I was thinking to myself that it felt exactly like snorting
a hallucinogenic research chemical
(it was called 2ct7), something I did a number of times years ago in my
early 20’s. People who knew about this research chemical always warned about
how harsh it was to snort it, but
we still did it because it was hard to get and very expensive (too
expensive to “waste” by taking in pill form). So we would do lines of it -it
felt like razor blades cutting the insides of my nostrils-
I would writhe on the floor it was so painful.
We went to the c7 and the research chem I was into was c7, is there a
connection (?)
I feel like the water trituration sparked a detox of the leftover 2ct7
left over in my nostrils (and subsequent brain damage?) from so long ago. I
remember reading that snorting drugs can change
the inside of your nostrils somehow, the mucus membrane. Maybe my
nostrils and brain are getting the chance to start over again.
November 15
Last night the only dream I can remember is I took someone else’s baby
and I was told to let him suck on my breast even though I had no milk because
it was not my baby.
U had a dream of strolling along the water, saw a boat, then he went for
a swim. Also he was going to introduce a sister of a friend of his (who doesn’t
have a sister in real life though) to his family.
Lately I’ve been reading lots about how to transfer the energy of a
remedy into a patient (without them taking the remedy), and why that might be
useful. I found Heart Resonance,
the founder is planning a trip to Mount Shasta and the idea really
appealed to me (this was around the time I gathered the water).
Now, that is not really resonating with me so I am wondering if all this
searching, desire to travel, wanderlust basically was an effect of the proving.
Also, U took up soccer around the time
of the gathering of the water. He’d been putting it off forever and
finally decided to act.
I am very tired and keep craving sugar..
Hmm...I just realized, maybe it’s about really solidifying my identity
as a homeopath. I was looking into doing other therapies but homeopathy is
really enough, much more than enough
(in fact, taken over a lot of my life and I like it that way). Being
satisfied with what I’m doing now and not needing more.
Water is H2O.....hydrogen and oxygen. According to Scholten Hydrogen is
about Incarnation (to be or not to be). Maybe that’s where Shakespeare comes
in. Oxygen is on the row of self worth.
I wonder if I was questioning my worth as a homeopath(?)
The concept of fluid identity comes to mind with this remedy.
November 16
Last night dreamed of being by the water, and we were driving from town
to town by the seaside. Lots of sneezing today! Reminds me of hayfever.
Met with an old friend who has had some hypnosis training as well as
heart resonance. When she started talking about hypnosis she talked a lot about
the subconscious and about wanting to
be reborn. I wonder if I was drawn to hypnosis recently because it’s
about accessing the subconscious?()
November 18
More dreams of being by the water, U had a dream of kayaking U has had stinging
burning sensation in both nostrils the last few days, and sneezing I notice my
nasal congestion < at night (definitely a worse night modality)
November 19
Dream last night of having a deep, round hole in my skin after having a
blemish that wouldn’t heal, it was perfectly round, red and very ugly.
I have the feeling of my brain having been wiped, not erased but
cleaned. They say (e.g. Tinus Smits says) the nose is the drain of the brain
and if that is so I feel like I have new brain cells and any brain damage
caused from mistakes in my youth have been erased.
November 25
For a few days leading up to my period I had very sore breasts. What was
unusual was how many days it lasted and how sore they were - definitely worse
then usual symptoms.
Still a bit of congestion and it has definitely been worse left side.
November 26
There are eruptions that look like bug bites (raised, swollen) on my
right hand and arm - also one on my left arm and the right side of my neck.
Congestion worse again and I wonder if it was partially alcohol to
blame.
Last night dream of being in a house in the wild somewhere at the top of
a hill. There were wolves at the bottom of the hill and they kept running up
the hill and coming into the house through
an opening - I was worried for my safety.
Noticed my congestion was better when I went outside into rainy weather
and got worse when I went inside. If my throat gets too dry I cough (dry
cough).
November 28
U dream: I had done a quick course in music and decided to teach music,
and U was mad I rushed into doing it without proper training, one of his
friends was learning music from me and U
was warning him I wasn’t properly qualified. Also I was dressing provocatively
for the music lessons and U and I were having sex before/after the lessons so
sex was a theme.
The other night I had a dream that I was with a large number of U’s
family members, I remember us singing something together.
December 5
Over the past weekend I woke up with a headache one day and another day
had random head pains on random spots on my head. Right now as I type this I am
feeling a tingling sensation at
the crown of my head.
Today as I was talking with my friend I told her I feel like I am
surrounded by crazy people.
A relative’s husband, who she is now separated from, I just found out,
was and is suffering from severe depression. He seemed normal when I would see
him, but suffered from severe mood
swings and alcoholism.
There’s a part of me that doesn’t want to reveal these things.
I want this proving to be anonymous.
These things are too private to reveal.
A friend of mine who only a little while ago was sane has now gone, as
far as I can tell, insane. I feel like she is an alien, too strange and cultish
to relate too. If you’re not part of her cultish beliefs there is nothing to
talk about with her.
A friend’s boyfriend threatened to kill her. He had a psychotic break.
Her future father in law is a psychic of sorts, predicting a future for my
friend that is scary and most likely not real.
The idea came up during the conversation, are some of the people in the
alternative health field insane?
They see things, entities, etc. For example, the creator of heart
resonance, which I was so drawn to a few weeks ago. He had a history of
childhood abuse and now sees entities.
My friend has noticed that people who have been traumatized in their
life can often have mental illness.
Some of those people can also have hallucinations. If the person is
unable or unwilling to deal with that trauma, they could go insane from the
effort of suppressing that trauma. The brain compartmentalizes the trauma,
resulting in a stress in another part of the brain, because something’s got to
give. Those traumatized people wish they could be Dolls, that their memory
could
be completely erased. But the brain doesn’t really work like that.
But wait, maybe it does sometimes. Maybe there are people who get
neurodegenerative brain disorders who have had trauma in their past, and they
really truly can forget that past (Alzheimers).
Somehow, their brains are able to shut down so that the past can be
forgotten (I’m thinking of my grandmother now, who died from a degenerative
brain condition, there were memories from WW2 that were painful for her).
Hmm...not quite right because her memories were intact. However, it is the
nervous system that was affected for her.
December 6
When people do drugs, aren’t they trying to erase a memory, push it down
just to have fun. Because their real life without the drugs is not that fun.
Self medication. That sort of thing can be done
in the natural health field as well. Push away the negative thoughts and
only “think happy” all the time (The Secret). If we try to live in the positive
and deny the negative, that’s not balanced.
The question has been posed: why do we have to do this? Why do we have
to go through the negative stuff to understand the remedy? That’s because we
need to understand all aspects of a remedy. And it’s OK to go through the
negative stuff, to face that side of the remedy, because that’s the truth of
the remedy.
Each time we go down the rabbit hole, all we’re doing is meeting aspects
of ourselves. Some may see that as scary or dangerous, but I find it an
adventure, a type of exploration of one’s own psyche.
December 8
Dreamed of situation from my past, I went to sit down on a bench and
there were some people beside me and though it was slightly altered it reminded
me of an issue from my past. I came face
to face with it without fear or judging myself.
We can make choices, and things happen to us - some of it just seems to
be fate, some of it based on choice. I guess you can say, when you are younger,
you may have made some poor choices out
of ignorance.
I lived with so much emotional pain and confusion in the past. It was a
bit like being in a nightmare -I was asleep and powerless to change anything-
or so I thought. Sometimes we are trapped in
the limitations of our own mind.
I feel like I’ve come so far. I am growing as a person and willing to
face my issues head on, whereas the “old way” would’ve been to try to stuff
them down or pretend they don’t exist. Facing the past with honesty gives me
hope of a better future.
When I woke up this morning from that dream my brain felt cleansed. I
blew mucus (clear pus) from my nose and am continuing to do this morning. It’s
not possible to erase the past but it is possible to gain a different
perspective on life, to grow and to transform as a person.
December 9
As I get closer to finishing this document, I periodically experience
short, sharp intense pains in various parts of my head, never lingering too
long. Headache and nerve pain come to mind.
Lots of autism clients this week, very little else (2 phone calls today,
both autism).
December 10
I finally understand the meaning of the phrase “I am my own worst
enemy.”
December 11
Looked up Renaissance poetry (promised myself to look it up later when I
had time). Why Renaissance
poetry during the trituration?
http://www.botticellisvision.com/st%20francis%20web%20site/ibs1-indisputable_benefits_of_studying.htm
Because this poetry transcends time and space through the power of
imagination. It says that the world of the imagination is superior to the
corporeal world, a big theme of the remedy (and its affinity for the mind vs.
the body). There is also a theory in this poetry that the imagination can bring
healing in times of psychological pain.
Hamlet’s opinion -caught between the balance of knowledge and ignorance
concerning his father’s death- not knowing the truth (goes back to Socrates).
Opinion is neither fact nor pure ignorance,
it hangs in the balance.
Renaissance poetry mirrors universal experiences
A friend last night was talking at a party about Iboga (ibogaine)
therapy for drug addicts.
It’s a hallucinogenic drug.
It helps the addict’s mind access traumas from the past so they can be
dealt with, then they can overcome their addiction.
Seems like homeopathic water would work a lot like ibogaine, but cheaper
(homeopathy is known to be very cost effective).
November 20, 2012: Potentizing from 40C to 220C,
Notes
Water = life
Could revive someone near death
Suicidal tendencies
Neurological damage from toxins
Damage
Bottomless - goes deep
Emotional breakdown “Going crazy”
Losing it
Glass half empty/full
Memory loss
Confusion/old age/dementia
Serious pathologies
Vaccine damage
Vorwort/Suchen Zeichen/Abkürzungen Impressum