Averrhoea bilimbi
Vergleich: Siehe: Oxydales
[Jan Scholten]
Lamu Provings
Introduction
DD.: Fluorine. Stage 17 (We see the rejection and crime,
the cruelty and despair)
There is a hardness, coldness from having received no love
or care in their youth. It is like young men living on the streets, fighting in
street gangs. They have no self worth and self love so they don’t have love for others.
In the extreme they can be cruel and heartless, even become a criminal.
Mind:
Full of hatred, from a bad youth, having no father, an
uncaring and hard mother, living on the street.
Young man in street gangs; kicking, hitting, beating,
threatening passers-by.
Criminal, South American drug dealer, imprisoned, Russian
roulette.
Anger, aggressive anger, desire to kill, shoot them in
the head, without pleasure, joy, just nothingness.
Desire money, wealth, women, but not pleased by it,
cannot really enjoy what they have.
No respect for nature, people.
Hard, heartless, fearless, dark, no feelings, menacing,
defiant, cruel anger.
Aversion contact, being talked to, being looked at;
distant.
Everyone is seen as stupid, especially weak people in
poverty.
Desire to be in the centre to frighten everyone passing
by.
Images: guns.
Desire to hurt people, infect them with malaria, fuck
them
Dark seedy.
Mindlessness.
Wealth, hardness, heartless.
Desire: music of Metallica, album St Anger.
Feeling better by getting in contact with ones own hate
and use the energy differently.
General:
Desire: coffee, alcohol, tequila:
Sleep: sleepy, dazed; yawning.
Head: headache, behind left eye.
Nose: itching; sniffing.
Trituration proving, 18-3-2011, Lamu.
Provers: Prover 11, Prover 12, Prover 15.
Fuck you.
Wealth, hardness, heartless.
South American drug dealer.
Cruel.
Guns.
Dark seedy.
Prover 15 puts on shirts and opens his shirt, he can feel
his genitals, a sexual energy .. looks like he should have 2 babes beside him
in white bikinis.
Prover 11 grinding the powder very hard,
"I feel angry hard aggressive anger .. I could stand
over someone and shoot them in the head .. no pleasure .. no enjoyment .. just
a nothingness.
No amount of wealth or women could please you, no respect
for nature, no respect for each other.
Prover 11: I am a man.
Just interested in each other for the business deals, no
fear no feelings.
Everyone is stupid .. your poverty makes me sick, how
could you be so weak.
Prover 12: I have no interest in listening to either of
you.
Russian roulette.
Prover 15 gestures at Prover 11 a gun .. pow.
you are bimbos .. he has an evil look in his eye,
menacing look in his eyes.
We do not trust each other, where the fuck is the coffee.
We choose the centre of the house to sit, in command ..
no one fuck with us.
Prover 15: I got a headache behind his left eye .. Prover
11 also
Prover 12 is sleepy .. itchy nose .. yawning .. Prover 15
also yawning.
Stupid people laughing upstairs
Prover 15 yawning and headache.
Prover 11 yawning, very tired, sniffing, cruel anger no
feeling.
Prover 11 not answering when spoken too.
Prover 11 to Prover 15: I would like to see a malaria
mosquito bite you.
Prover 11: I want tequila.
Prover 15: I hope this feeling goes or we'll ruin the
party .. pushing the bimbos into the pool, what is going on in your silly
little brain.
Prover 15: I want by will to have evil inside me.
Prover 11 is distant not connecting with us.
Mindlessness.
Music of Metallica.
No desire for anyone to talk or connect with anyone,
sleazy, dazed feeling- all separate doing own thing- not caring or checking
with each other.
Prover 11 puts on Metallica .. loud .. St Anger.
Kicking - street gangs .. anger no father.
Mother not caring.
Guns at boys.
Street gangs.
Kick .. hit .. beat, want everyone to feel our anger ..
unloved .. no love.
C2
Now talking to each other again.
Prover 15- kick the shit out of people, high security
prison.
Mexican.
In prison you go into yourself into the pain and anger,
the grief comes when you cannot kill someone in anger, you cannot act it out
anymore you have to go inwards, own it you are only angry with yourself, stop,
cry, get in contact with your own hate and use the energy differently, like
nazi Germans had to be stopped, being put in prison is done with care.
Prover 15 now feels peace and a good feeling Prover 11
asks if Prover 15 wants his toe nails painted .. no they'd fuck me on the
beach.
Prover 15 moves over beside Prover 11 and puts his arm
around her, I want to show I like her after all the hate .. sister / brother
feeling, sisters and brothers in larger sense, brotherhood .. street gangs, try
and see the pointlessness of hate everybody then wins.
Pointlessness of fighting, Solution .. is to have street
parties instead, PARTY, OF LOVE .. FAMILY .. WE ARE FAMILY.
"We are the world, we are the children, we are the
ones to make a brighter day so lets start, living, there is a choice we 're
making to save our own lives,
its true we make a better place .. just you and me".