Phascolarctos cinereus Anhang
[Phillip Robins]
Serum extract from the chest scent gland of an adult male Koala. This
gland produces an pungent, orange-coloured secretion which they rub on the base
of trees and long branches.
The koala is a very ancient and primitive mammal. Fossil evidence of
Koalas has been found in Western Australia that dates back to the Pleistocene
era.
The male koala is polygamous, taking from three to seven females for
it's family group. Once formed these family groups do not easily break up, and
they seldom trespass on the
territory of another family. Family members like to congregate in the
same area, feeding almost exclusively on Eucalyptus leaves of particular types.
Koalas spend about 80% of
their lives sleeping or resting and almost 20% eating, leaving less than
1% to move from tree to tree and do everything else.
[Phillip Robins]
The Eucalyptus leaves, which constitute the major part of their diet
contain over forty different chemical substances, including many alcohols, aldehydes, esters, terpenes,
phenols and ketones.
‘Since all these substances are drugs of some kind, the koala is, in
every sense of the word, a drug addict’ according to Ambrose Pratt an eminent
Australian Zoologist.
Koalas are subject to various diseases; some having wiped out large
populations in past years. Diseases include: cystic ovaries and cystic
fallopian tubes, pulmonary diseases, nephritis and cystitis, ophthalmia and conjunctivitis, several related to infection
with chlamydia. Immune deficient states have been
noted.
THEMES:
I AM: (Curative)
- My needs are important to me; I did what I wanted to do.
- Felt confident. I’m OK.
- Intolerant of others, when it is different to my needs.
- Not aware/concerned about others feelings.
- Sense of what things are good for me; when I did what was good for me
I felt heaps better and light.
- Felt Okay to just be me in any situation
IT'S NOT OK TO BE JUST ME, I don't fit in.
- I have to do something; make my mark.
- Covering up what one has done wrong.
UNGROUNDEDNESS
- Just floating or cut adrift. Feel separate.
- I am influenced by whatever comes in. No sense of my center; not centred.
DETACHED FROM SELF AND OTHERS.
- Did not even think about what my family felt about it (me leaving
home).
- I let myself have sex with a new guy - I didn’t want to - I didn’t
feel anything, but did it anyway (not like me).
- Shutting off/closing down.
No conscience or guilt:
- A self-righteousness about getting what I want.
- No concern for others feelings.
- Hard and cruel; callousness.
ISOLATION/ALONE:
- Sad & lonely. Felt sad and isolated; felt totally alone.
- No one there for me; no point asking for help; it’s too bad, no one
can help.
- I’ve got no friends
. Feel alien to my own family.
- Desire to be alone; away from everyone.
CAN’T TRUST ANYONE/UNSAFE:
- Fear of being trapped/taken hostage; seized/captured.
- HIDING; Have to hide a secret; make smokescreens.
- Fear of physical injury; being killed.
- Can’t talk to my supervisor; can’t trust her/him.
- If I tell anyone my stuff they will think it’s my fault.
BEING PART OF A GROUP VERSES BEING AN OUTSIDER:
- Even though I felt obliged to take it for the group I felt to follow my
feeling - didn’t take it (the proving) and glad I didn’t as old personal stuff
came up.
- Could still be me and be in a group (curative)
- Dreams of groups/communities/families.
- After the first proving there was a conflict in the study group over
whether one student member should be allowed to join a practitioner support
group we
were proposing to start. After this conflict, two members left the
group.
DESIRE TO LEAVE THE FAMILY:
- No concern for family’s needs/feelings in this matter.
- I have to leave the family to be me.
- I’ll just go (away).
Territorial issues:
- Avers anyone in my space/home/bed.
- Dream of my own car space.
- Wanted to cut all non-indigenous trees out.
OLD INJURIES FLARE UP or BECOME PAINFUL.
DESIRE to SLEEP and REMAIN in BED:
- Felt like lying in bed in the morning and cuddling up.
- Hard to get out of bed in the mornings.
DRUG ADDICT:
- So depressed desired to take drugs.
- Suddenly took up smoking again; compulsively.
- Wanted to take heroin very strongly.
- Confusion as if intoxicated.
- Distortion of time.
- Everything changes
- As if have a hangover; very restless - feels like (LSD) withdrawals.
- Dreams as if a series of bad trips; between each there is a shift and
then another series; these series go on until good and bad become
confused/equal.
Sexuality:
- Breasts: - felt good about my (large) breasts; sensual.
- dreams about men with breasts or being chatted up by a woman with
large breasts who is a truck driver.
ANIMAL THEMES:
- Dream of animals being butchered; packed into a box.
- Spitting in rage.
- Fear of being captured; injured; killed; must stay alert.
- Pursuing a secret romance with fear of being caught. Flirting with a
friend; inappropriate affair.
- Group issues; wanting/not wanting company of people; communities of
people.
- Power/will issues; standing up for self strongly.
- Colours: red, yellow, orange and black; changed colour of hair.
- Holding on in a big wind.
SYPHILITIC:
- No hope; no way out; depressive and gloomy; I’ll just go! Feel I just
want the wind to take me away.
- I feel that some of the damage (to my mind and body) will be
irreparable.
- Night <.
- A stubborn remedy: difficult to antidote.
CYCLIC:
- Remedy effect goes away and comes back again.
- Dreams repeat over and over.
WHOLE PROVING of a SIGNIFICANT PROVER:
(With dream titles/summaries by proving coordinator)
Immediately on taking the remedy, as if on ecstasy
- everything looks yellow; feel giggly. [immediate]
Hanging from a height; embarrassed; urinating; sex; breasts.
Dream: in many parts.
a) I am a gladiator, hanging from a bar 15 - 20
m high for a long time. I am fully armoured. Scared of falling.
b) Strangling my ex-boyfriend; pushing my
thumbs in to his throat.
c) Ghost train ride with mum and dad in India.
They don’t like it; I feel embarrassed, act stupid and talk loud.
d) Looking after a lost dog at mum and dad’s
place. I go outside for a piss and dad is standing in the back doorway naked,
pissing. I say hello and he jumps,
pisses on himself, makes a fuss. I ignore this.
e) Being chatted up by a guy in a bar. I
consider having sex with him, but don’t.
f) Being chatted up by a woman with large
breasts in a car. She is a truck driver; we talk about trucks. [night]
Grumpy and angry in the morning on waking.
Happy, soft, affectionate in evening. [day]
Bad sleep; I felt I was fighting my boyfriend for space all night.
Grumpy in the morning. [day]
A koala spent the day sitting in a small gum tree outside my bedroom;
when I was on the phone to my supervisor it scratched on my door. [day ]
Too depressed to write my diary; feel like a monster; everyone I love
hates me. Started bleeding yesterday; it hurts. I miss my baby. (had an
abortion several months ago)
No money, no hope; feel like I just want the wind to take me away. Ate a
whole packet of chocolate biscuits. [day]
Woke very depressed and sore from my period; cancelled my gym session
and stayed in bed till 2 pm. Felt in a state of poverty. Ate icecream and smoked. [day 10]
Felt incredibly bored today! [day 11]
Nest of flies eggs.
Dream: I had a cut in the sole of my right foot - inside the cut were
two layers of spam - in between the spam was a rectangular ‘nest’ of flies
eggs. Completely
revolted by dream all day! [day 12]
Red and yellow.
Dream: My ex-boyfriend was dressed all in red and yellow - a bike jersey
and loose pants - he looked very beautiful. [day 13]
Last night I couldn’t sleep. Anxiety about no money; feel everyone
ripped me off. Thinking of all the ways to loose weight and make money etc -
obsessively. Had to get up
and eat and smoke. [day 23]
In connection with people I feel really hurt. [day 24]
I can’t stand to be in myself. I can’t stand anyone looking at me. I can’t
get out of bed. [day 24]
I think I want to be on my own - I can’t deal with people, but I’m not
self contained either. I don’t like any of my friends.
Been brutally honest: ‘how dare you!’ [day 26]
No sense of my center; not centred. I feel on
the edge of loosing it; total ungroundedness; just
floating or cut adrift. < sugar, alcohol or tobacco; any drugs; going to
town.
I am influenced by whatever comes in. This makes me nervous. I loose
faith in myself and everyone else. In connections with people I feel really
hurt. Nothing feels right;
I do not know how I will be when I wake up in the morning. It’s like the
fuzzy feeling in one’s head after a lot of acid trips - not down or up, but
just wanting to be down.
As if something extra in my brain (ie. a
drug). [day 28]
I feel I can’t live in this place any more. [day 28]
I don’t belong; outcast - should go; defeated.
‘It felt a really important dream’: At my sister and husband’s place -
it’s Christmas. They wanted me to stay. I felt I didn’t belong and that they
were just inviting me to be nice.
I felt an outcast – should go. Felt a lot more comfortable going.
Outside – a big expanse of land on a cliff top. A violent storm comes - the
wind is pushing me back - couldn’t
walk against it. Tidal waves are coming over the cliff and up to me.
They mostly go into huge crevices before they get to me. The water wasn’t
strong on the land where I was.
In the crevices there were massive waves as if coming from subterranean
depths.
I couldn’t now go - too dangerous. I wanted to try anyway. Then my
sister and her husband came running out crying, thinking I was killed in the
storm. I went back with them
and had Christmas dinner with them. I still didn’t want to be there. I
felt defeated. - - - - - [day 28]
I feel like giving up - I'll just go (away).
I feel that some of the damage (from the proving) to my mind and body
will be irreparable.
Been hanging out with T who is a totally loony drug addict and its Okay.
Want to antidote the proving. [day 28]
On consulting with her supervisor homoeopathic LSD was suggested as a
possible antidote. The prover responded with ‘I don’t
want any drugs in me.’ We decided on using
her blood, potentised, to antidote the proving
because of it’s similarity with drug toxicity. It was partly successful, antidoting the worst symptoms.
THE PROVING: WHOLE PERSON:
Immediately on taking the remedy, as if on ecstasy - everything looks
yellow; feel giggly.
Sense of wellbeing; really centred; everything is OK .
Sense of peace; happy to be just here as opposed to the normal ambitious
state of having to make my mark somewhere.
Laid back. Sense of TOTAL contentment; really nice feeling; can sit and
be [4].
Feel more fully alive again - as if I have been cut off from myself.
More emotional life; happy; no anxiety about what others think of me. [12, day
6]
Sense of what things are good for me; felt ‘that is not good for me’ or
‘that is good for me’; Eg. felt working double shifts
was not good for me, and when I did it I felt heavy
and tired. When I did what was good for me Eg.
eat a certain thing or rest, I felt light and good [4].
Felt a confidence to just be myself with no anxiety about life. No
anxiety about what others think of me [12, day 4]
Had a strong feeling not to take the remedy; even though felt obliged to
and that I would be letting the group down. As the time to take it drew closer
the feeling got stronger;
in the end I felt to follow my feeling. It turned out for the best as
the next few days lots of old personal issues come up and I had to work through
them, so was glad I hadn't taken it.
Desire to be alone and sleep. [8, day 3]
Wanted to be in a snug place. Preferred to be alone. Avers seeing any
friends. [3, day 1]
I think I want to be on my own - I can’t deal with people, but I’m not
self contained either. I don’t like any of my friends. [11, day 26]
Wanted to be alone and didn’t want to talk to anyone [10, day 4]
Spent the day happy to stay closed up in my office by myself. Very unsociable;
avoiding contact with my wife. No interest in making up with my wife (after a
fight). [12, day 2- 4]
Lying in bed I still feel no strong emotional connection with my wife.
It is not a lack of caring; just a stronger sense of my own body’s needs and
comfort. If she wants to participate
in something that is enjoyable for my body, then that is nice. Otherwise
I feel no responsibility for making her happy. Without contact, it seems to
grow stronger till I am avoiding
people and closing myself away. There is an increased pleasure in my own
comfort. No guilt about it. [12, day 4]
No sense of my center; not centred. I feel on
the edge of loosing it; total ungroundedness; just
floating or cut adrift. < alcohol or tobacco. I am influenced by whatever comes
in.
This makes me nervous.
I loose faith in myself and everyone else. Nothing feels right; I do not
know how I will be when I wake up in the morning. It’s like the fuzzy feeling
in one’s head after a lot of
acid trips - not down or up, but just wanting to be down. As if
something extra in my brain (ie. a drug). [11, day
28]
A ‘breakdown’ - crying and really wanting to use heroin. I’m such a
failure. There is no support for me, no one I can trust. Felt very fearful of
doing it. I couldn’t ring my supervisor.
Saw a ‘Save the Koala’ T-shirt today, and thought ‘that’s all very well,
but who’ll save me!’ [9, day 3]
Wake 4 h. feeling angry, sad and scared all together. As if gone through
a cycle of up and down with the proving and now there has been a sideways shift
and have gone through
it again. Image of being continually reintoxicated.
These cycles go on and on until good and bad become confused/equal. As if been
on a series of bad trips and feel afraid they will
never end. They get laid over each other and become confused. [12, day
21 after discussion about the proving.]
I can’t stand to be in myself. I can't stand anyone looking at me. I can’t
get out of bed. [11, day 24]
I feel I cant live in this place any more [11, day 28]
Feel really miserable all day; feel stuck; just want out of this state
[10, day 5]
Thinking about moving away from my family so I can be on my own. I’m
allowed to. Arrange to move out for three months, with an option for a further
three (in a married woman
with two boys).
Dreamt I bought a caravan. [9, day 5] - - - -
Told my husband I will be leaving in three months - they don’t need me
any more. [10, day 4]
I feel like giving up - I’ll just go (away). [11, day 28]
Found myself looking at red things; just stopped whatever I was doing
and looked at the red flowers or the red carpet or red compost bin. I really
like red and green. [10, day 3]
I have taken a great liking to the red carpet and rub it with my hands
[10, day 4]
Not bothered by wearing black undies for the
first time [12, day 5]
MIND EMOTIONS:
Very confident. When put on the spot by my boss I held my place and
words were there for me. Could argue my case well [7, day 4].
Depressed at 0.47 h. - lonely - felt like I must get out and go where
there are people [6].
Anxiety [cs,1]
Felt like crying all day; felt sad and isolated. With friends, I didn’t
get the jokes, felt different, isolated, stuck in self - yuck [7, day 3].
Grumpy and angry in mornings, happy, soft and affectionate in the
evenings [11, day 3].
No fear about taking the remedy at all [cs,6]. I impulsively took it two
days early without thinking [6]. (Prover is a new
member to the proving group.)
Very flirtatious with a friend that evening [7, day 2].
After my husband would not go for a walk with me felt rejected and
deeply hurt. Rage with screaming; after I ran out of things to scream about I
spat at him. Then felt a big shame
about it and wanted to be a way from everyone except my child. As if in
after shock [7, day 2].
Very irritable all day esp if I couldn’t do
what I wanted to do or if someone else did something different to the way I
wanted it. Got very grumpy with that. [10, day 4]
MIND INTELLECT:
No word logic. Left and right things bit muddled. [4]
Clear thinking; single minded; dealing with what's going on now [4].
Vague for days .
DREAMS:
(With a title/summary by the proving coordinator.)
Community; without need to talk; my own space.
1. In a large barn type building with a lot (about 30) of people sitting
around reading. I go off to a nother barn and watch
TV. There are groups of people here watching different TVs.
The whole group is like a community where I once lived (like an extended
family). This is what they do - all hang out together. A very strong communal
sense; all without speaking.
2. I back my Kombi van into a triangular parking lot reserved for my
school people. It is a tight fit. I bump into a shelf. Once in, someone gets
out my portable TV (that I have never used before) and sets it up to watch it
with their friends. The space has changed into a kitchen type room (open, but
with benches). [12, night 2]
Spiritual nurturing of my soul; male/female.
‘The best dream of my life’. In meditation with my Guru (a male) and
other people. (First time I am there and others there also.) I started to go
into shocks and moans - a kind of chorea - from the spiritual energy. My guru
leant over and uncovered his breast (a female breast) and fed me milk from it.
I felt nurtured to my soul by God - - - - - [7, day 4].
Holding on in a big wind. On a boat sailing - on a raft hanging onto the
side with a strong wing pushing at me. Amazed at my strength to hold on in the
big wind. Felt good [3].
Not connecting with anyone. My wife (B), myself and a group of people
decide to go out for dinner. As everyone is going there I decide to go
somewhere else without telling anyone
as I can’t find B, and feel no need to do so. I later rejoin the group
after dinner - B has gone and I don’t connect with anyone [8, day 1].
Leaving a group of people [8, day 2].
Friends left me [3].
Dreamt of friends; woke calling their names; next day happy to see them
[3, day 2].
Hiding; caught; enjoying old friends.
In an unusual place; an army truck - told ‘you have to hide, people are
coming’. I hid under a blanket in the back of the truck - very still and
feeling scared of being caught. They found me and took me to a camp - met old
friends there and had a good time. Later they sent me home [3].
Hiding the evidence of my mistake; danger. 7
Left in charge of a studio - it is my responsibility. I forget to lock
the door. I come back to find some people had moved in and turned it into a
railway station. Seemed unbelievable to me that trains would know to stop here.
Finally asked them to all leave. I expected a confrontation but there was none.
Had to clean up before a scheduled exhibition. Had to hide every little piece
of evidence of my mistake/failure to look after it [6].
Riding a bike backwards down a hill; couldn’t steer properly or brake. Afraid
I would fall off and hurt myself - real fear of the physical pain [6, day 2].
Urinating in public; hide the evidence. I urinate on a tray in a
restaurant. Surprised at myself for doing it. I tried to hide the evidence.
Waiter came to collect the tray. I looked at the ground rather than at him -
hoped he wouldn’t notice [6, day 4].
Hiding; secret; up high; smoke for camouflage.
Dream series:
1. Counting; adding up figures. Later, worried a secret might be found
out. Hiding from foreigner(s).
2. Bridges and rivers - where is the highest, closest bridge? - wanting
to be up very high.
3. Burning something for camouflage. [9, day 1]
Feel tricked. My daughter and her friends partying at my house (when I’m
out). She told me she was going to be at her friends house. I felt tricked. [9,
day 3]
A disrespectful trick. A friend of my mothers who was a landscaper gave
mum a bill for $130,000. It was too much. I was trying to reason with her that
it wasn’t right. Felt taken advantage of; a dirty trick. Frustrated; how could
you do something this unpleasant. [13, night 1]
Unethical sex; many names; reality/real name. I made love to a female
client at work (counselling). I stopped myself with the thought - I shouldn’t
be doing this. Later, I had to book
in a new resident.
I asked him if that was his name (written on a small bag he was
carrying). Reply ‘I go by many names’. I said ‘here we are concerned with
reality - what is your birth name?’
He gave me his name. [9 day 4]
Not succeeding; put down my family; a secret affair; I don’t care. A
theme of trying to do many things but not succeeding at any of them [os,6].
Very critical of my family - putting them down to other people. My
brother appeared grossly deformed. Pursuing a secret, romantic affair -
watching out for disapproval from others -feeling I will be caught, but I don’t
care. Flying for the joy and freedom of it [6, day 1].
Intellectual difficulties; held hostage/captured.
Have a feeling ‘here’s that dream again’ but can’t remember ever having
it before [7, day 2].
I was asked to take my son out of school because of his intellectual
difficulties. I become my son hostage. I went to rehab (work), they kept me
there. Felt really fearful of being kept, captured [7, day 2].
Danger of being killed; over the edge from drugs; stay alert. I hear
groans and thrashings from my flatmates bedroom. I hear flatmates voice at my
door ‘I’ll seize him’. I think he is mad - all the drugs he has taken have
driven him over the edge. I think he’s going to come in and kill me by hitting
me over the head. I struggle awake and listen for awhile; it seems very real.
I felt I must be alert and ready [6].
Lost in an unknown place; I don’t care. Job of driving a special person.
Finished work 2 - 3 h.; the city is totally empty at this time. I am supposed
to meet my husband - he is not there - lost in an unknown city - I didn’t care
or worry [7].
I don’t belong; outcast - should go; defeated. ‘It felt a really
important dream’: At my sister and husband's place - it’s Christmas. They
wanted me to stay. I felt I didn't belong and that they were just inviting me
to be nice. I felt an outcast - should go. Felt a lot more comfortable going.
Outside - a big expanse of land on a cliff top. A violent storm comes – the
wind is pushing me back - couldn’t walk against it. Tidal waves are coming over
the cliff and up to me. They mostly go into huge crevices before they get to
me. The water wasn’t strong on the land where I was. In the crevices there were
massive waves as if coming from subterranean depths. I couldn’t now go - too
dangerous. I wanted to try anyway. Then my sister and her husband came running
out crying, thinking I was killed in the storm.
I went back with them and had Christmas dinner with them. I still didn’t
want to be there. I felt defeated. [11, day 28]
Indignant rage - striking; leaving; reflection alone. Had an argument
with my wife (B); we made up. Were under the house with two other friends; B
said some thing that offended me and I slapped her face. She said it again and
I slapped her face again. I felt enraged and had to act on it. I thought ‘They
have seen how it really is with us and that’s okay’. A sense of no one to
blame. I then felt sad and concerned at my violence and left on a long walk in
the streets. I found myself on a school bus travelling several suburbs away. I
get off in pouring rain and started to walk back. A sense of being with myself
trying to get some perspective on the argument. [12 night 1]
Uncomfortable meeting; free falling; toxic orange cloud.
1. My wife (B) and I are talking to two guys about forming a community.
One guy has 150 ha and offers it. There is nowhere to stay the night so we go
to leave. Very rough roads to drive out. They didn’t seem together people.
Where will we sleep?
2. My mother and B go sky diving in this deep water tank. My mother
learns how to control and steer her free fall. I tell her how to do it.
Sensation of free falling is enjoyable. Half the way down I hang
a cord down to the bottom of the tank and stir up an orange cloud of
sediment. I don’t like the look of it - looks toxic; so I stop the free fall
and get out of the tank. I ask tho tank owner what he
has used in the tank water - he says a chemical sunlight to purify the water. I
explain to him that it is a sham and is actually toxic. He is dumbfounded and I
leave. [12, night 8]
Good food; wrapped up; overflowing; over the edge; fear of tunnel.
A series:
1. That bread and butter is good for you. Walking a round looking for
the right person to give it to.
2. A suburban backyard scene; there is a railway line running through
the yard. Beyond it are two fat, podgy women lying on lounges; one has her
lower body wrapped in plastic; with lots of makeup on.
3. I’m standing in next doors backyard looking into the toilet which had
an elaborate cistern of one container filling and running over into a second
etc. Wondering what happens when
the third and last one fills up. Then I’m in a car full of people
driving around. Car nearly goes over the edge of something. Then back on the
road going over a low narrow bridge over water. I tell the driver not to go
over the edge. Nature? gets upset, then we get over it and we are at the
entrance to a tunnel that possibly goes underwater. I wake with a start or stop
the dream. I won’t go through a tunnel [os]. My head
is pounding. Go back to sleep.
4. Going to give a talk; G (my husband) won’t come; I’m wearing men’s
long underwear, a dress belonging to a young girl with a hoop skirt.
5. Next thing I’m packing handfuls of animals into cardboard boxes. At
the same time I’m in a house that I have the feeling of being there before .
Wrapped up; a facade; a big scar; put-down.
Dream series:
1. Someone wrapping up a newspaper by rolling it; it gets all in a mess.
I undo it and start again which angers the man who did it originally, and a
person gets wrapped up instead, like a mummy, except that each leg is wrapped
individually.
2. A colleague brings in a tape with her own and a friends voices on it
about a dream proving they did in Europe (my roots). A friend comes in and
shows us the scar from her caesarean: it goes 3/4 around her body except for a
small section on the right side, below the waist. It’s been healing well, but
everyone is astounded at the size of the scar.
The woman says it’s better for the baby that way; as it can wriggle out
of the body rather than being pulled out through a narrow cut. (Her explanation
seemed reasonable to me.) Another woman is going to slaughter her pets in an
adjacent room, I go as she gets ready to do so. (I felt Okay about it; it just
has to be.)
3. I unlock a door, enter a house, but the wall is only a facade. On the
other side, it’s outside again. I start a discussion about some Europeans
building thatched huts in north Queensland with some men. The question is: are
they waterproof or not? I tell him that I lived in a similar building when in
the Philippines. I then proceed into the basement of the disjointed building to
start work, and two people there tell me that I must be making about $1,000/week.
At first that sounds okay, but then I realise that they mean it in a nasty and
envious, down-putting way and I set the record straight: $100/ week at the
most. (I would normally not respond and would be left with the put-down feeling
for some time. This time I didn’t let them get away with it.) [2]
Audience; performing; no fear.
A circus: a group of friends and I are in the audience. Standing on a
trampoline, the performers want us to perform.
We jumper up before anyone else - no fear - surprised myself. The
performers applauded us [6, day 3 ].
Action/busy; lots of people; tired.
Very clear; lots of action; intense and very busy.
Cyclic.
Have a feeling ‘here’s that dream again’ but can’t remember ever having
it before [7, day 2].
Good food; cyclic.
Looking for good fruit in railway cars. The trains keep going round in
loops every 6 months. I would jump on looking for fruit then jump off or stay
on for the whole loop. [13, night 1]
With my sister and two children. There were three different snakes
around. [13, night 3]
Children playing in a big swimming pool .
Walking through a forest with big trees .
I was at my daughters funeral. [9, day 5]
Seem real; acted as if they really happened in the day [10].
Of everyday things [10]
Lots of action; lots of people in dream = felt tired next day and had to
push self [3, day 1].
GENERALS:
Left sided symptoms [1,8].
Right sided symptoms [6,7].
OLD INJURIES BECAME PAINFUL. [1,3,5,7]
Hot flushes and prickly skin at 10.47 pm, but < cold draff; must shut the window [6].
Hot [7, day 1 immediately].
Had to close window at night; avers breeze [7, day 1].
Had to open door to let in light at night [7, day 1].
Really drained by a hot day [10]
I did everything at night; felt cold and tired in day [3].
Felt tired and wanted to sleep, but when I did some thing the tiredness
went away and I had loads of energy, then when I stopped I felt tired again.
The more I did, the more energy
I got. [10, day 2 & 3]
Feel really tired and lazy (very unusual for me) [10].
Very tired during the day [13, day 5].
Feel like I have a hangover - toxic; < sun; light; a little >
dark. [9, day 3]
Desire for fresh air. [4]
Really > from a good cool breeze [10]
HEAD:
Developed a head cold for no reason:
- feel hot in head.
- pressure on left eye orbit; pressed in.
- Sore left side of face; cheek .
Dizzy, chilly, soft, quiet [11, day 3]
Fuzzy, heavy in head [13, days 1- 5]
Slight headache in R temple and base of neck. Neck and shoulders stiff
and sore [13 day 3].
Coloured her hair blue and green [11, day 7 - 12]
Put mauve and pink colour in hair [10, day 7]
Changed his hair style [12, day 2 - 21]
VERTIGO:
Giddy - vertex on each side - light headed like too much oxygen [4].
FACE:
Blind pimple in orbit over left eye [4].
Red rash on right side of face; dry and rough; very painful to touch =
burning.
Like cold sores, but hard and the skin is peeling over the sores.
Pussy pimples all over face. > anything cool esp
air. [10, day 3 +]
EYES:
Left eye bloodshot for one day [3].
Eyes watering [4].
On falling asleep a sensation as if my eyes were watering (but weren’t)
[9, day 1]
NOSE:
Left nose blocked.
- clear discharge at night.
- Sneezing and sniffling.
- Dry coryza .
Coryza < left nostril; < dust; with lacrymation of left eye [8]
Sneezing as soon as the remedy was mentioned [10].
Clear watery runny nose (Right side only) when talking about the remedy.
It got > for few hours after taking remedy [10].
Watering right nostril and right eye; > night; lying [10, day 2].
MOUTH:
Sensation as if dribbling/drooling from the left corner of mouth .
“As if tongue is burnt” [7].
Pimple like eruption on tongue and left side of upper lip [13, day 5].
Pimple like eruption on top of mouth [13, day 12]
Two ulcers in mouth, right side [13, day 11]
THROAT:
Difficult swallowing, as if a pea in throat [7]
Couldn’t swallow when trying to drink; just spat the water out [10, day
3]
STOMACH:
Appetite increased in the morning (usually none) [cs,6]
Thirst less [7].
Can’t drink anything hot; it burns all the way down to the stomach. [10,
day 3]
Only wanted to eat cheese and lettuce and bread [10, day 3]
Desire lemon/lime, carbonated. [os, 10]
HEART:
Heart beat rapidly [4].
ABDOMEN:
Pain in left inguinal region, with flatus and bloated feeling.
RECTUM:
Constipation; hard, large stool; difficult; not painful. Throbbing pain
in anus on lying down (haemorrhoid) [7, day 1].
Boil on right nate [7].
Pain in haemorrhoid [cs, 7, day 4].
Loose stools [13, days 1 - 5, and recurred 10 - 12]
BLADDER:
Dark urine [cs, 7, day 4].
Frequent urination during day; of varying amounts [10, day 2]
FEMALE:
I liked my breasts sexually/sensually [7, day 4].
Sore sensation across pelvic bone; > sitting forward [4].
MALE:
Sexual drive more animalistic; less restrained. [12]
EXTREMITIES:
Pain, aching in leg and down thigh; = had to go to bed and rest ; >
lying; < at site of old fracture .
Pain and stiffness in right shoulder [6].
Pain in right elbow, arm and right wrist; site of old injury. The nerve
response in the injured hand is reduced [7, day 3].
Pain in right knee - an old injury [3].
Arms from elbow to wrist numb and heavy [4].
SLEEP:
Hot and sweaty, esp on shoulders and back
during sleep; with desire to uncover [7, day 1].
Waking 2 - 3 h.; to urinate [cs,1]
Unable to sleep on left side; had to lie on right side [4].
Lying on left side = desire to urinate[4].
Lying on right side = nice snugly sleep [4].
Restless, broken sleep; waking often [6].
Wake at 4.30 am; quite awake [6]; with heart pounding [6].
Wake 6 am since proving, few days [7]; with headache. I want to get out
into the garden [7].
Stayed in bed till 12 h.; very comfortable with lots of covers; rugged
up and reading. Fully wrapped up; warm and relaxed [3].
Deep comfortable sleep; didn’t want to get up [10, day 3].
Slept in till 6 am (late) [13, day 1]
DD.:
Lac humanum: Lack of sense of belonging to
society; disconnected from self and others. Sense of isolation which does not
worry them; independence. Despair and depression.
Hura Brasiliensis: Despair; hopelessness and much suffering.
Floating; disconnected; alone. Selfhatred and
loathing. Feels an outcast/isolated.
Androctonos: No guilt in looking after one’s
own needs. Rage and violent behaviour. Feels alien and alone/isolated.
Vorwort/Suchen Zeichen/Abkürzungen Impressum